Episode Report Card Lady Lola: C | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT On Display
By Lady Lola | Season 3 | Episode 18 | Aired on 10.02.2011
As checkout looms, Albie points out that the Manzo brothers are coming up against a deadline for their black water launch party. Albie, who describes his modest upbringing (in which he shared a bed with Christopher for much of his childhood), is especially concerned because he wants to prove to his parents that he can make something of himself. Greg and Christopher take his point into consideration but tell him that he should enjoy his last night in Punta Cana while he can. They head to a restaurant where everyone's supposed to meet. It's a fancy riff on Benihana where the chefs light things on fire, and Albie comments, "Well that's not safe!" Sitting at a big, empty table, the three guys clink their sake glasses to the fact that they're actually on time while everyone else is late. What's new?
Everyone slowly trickles in, most notably Juicy and Teresa, who are somehow wasted. Kathy is less jolly, saying she's having vague stomach issues, which she interviews are a result of the confrontation with Teresa. Once everyone is seated, Christopher announces that he and Albie have deemed themselves judges of the Punta Princess Pageant. Caroline immediately eliminates herself from the running, and Jacqueline worries that the other ladies don't need any reason to complete with each other. "Besides," she says, "I think Greg's gonna win." That statement, of course, is overlaying a classic shot of Greg sipping his sake every so daintily.
But it seems the competition was over before it began. In the categories of style, creativity, and intellect, Teresa was awarded style since she lost her suitcase and "still pulled it together." Kathy was awarded creativity. In order to win Intellect and tie up the competition, Melissa has to name the Vice President of the United States. To give you a sense of context, the question is actually opened up to all three competitors and is met by befuddled looks all around, including the husbands. Teresa asks, "Is it Clinton? No, his wife!" Then Melissa chimes in, "That white guy with the grey hair!" Which, while closer than anything else on offer, also describes about 70% of politicians. Ohhh, but then she screams, "Dick Cheney!" And then, "Biden!"
So it's a tie between all three ladies. Frankly, I can't believe they're even indulging in this clear situation of systematic mockery, but these are also people who wear Yeti boots and have vanity recording studios in their own homes, so there's that... For the tie breaker, Christopher asks, "Do you guys know what continent Cairo's on?" Melissa yells proudly, "Antarctica!" Despite being blatantly wrong, everyone seems to enjoy her chutzpah. She asks, "I'm intellectual?" Teresa just shakes her head. Oh, Tre, you are a master of the pot-kettle without even knowing it!