Episode Report Card Erin: C | 3 USERS: B- YOU GRADE IT Double Your Premiere, Double Your Fun
By Erin | Season 4 | Episode 2 | Aired on 01.04.2005
"Sydney," Rick Yune tsk tsks. "Assassin-client privilege." Hee. He goes on to say that the day before he was supposed to kill Syd, his client was killed. Okay, did anyone not know at this point that Irina was the one who ordered the hit? Anyone? If you didn't get it by this point, then you really shouldn't be watching this show, dude. I'm sorry, but it's true. "I swear to god, I don't know anything about this," says Syd. "Somehow I believe you," says Rick Yune with real surprise in his voice. It's a nice moment, actually. And he plays it well. "I guess," he continues, "this is just one of those coincidences." Oh, yes, I get those all the time. Like, the guy who sells me my bagel every morning is actually…my long-lost half-brother who also happens to have killed our parents and disguised it as a freak polo accident. What a coincidence!
"Guess I can just sell you the sword and go home," snits Syd. "I'll just…take the sword," smiles Rick Yune. "How's that?" He nods again at the henchman, the mask is put back on, and Rick Yune pulls the water chain and walks off, leaving Syd to drown. Somewhere else in the building, Nadia's putting her smooch on. She's doing a damn fine job of looking like she's actually EATING Ponytail's lips off. Within seconds, we see why: Ponytail drops the ground, out like a light. Nadia rips some plastic off her lips and Marshall pipes up, "So, Nadia, the tranquilizer lips? Were they too red, do ya think?" Nadia doesn't answer. Instead, she grabs a key card from Ponytail and enters the secret portion of the building. Syd's still drowning under the watchful eye of the henchman. Nadia comes up behind him and takes him out. She runs over to Syd and removes the mask. Syd gathers her breath as Nadia moves to free her arms from the chair.
Just then, Rick Yune comes up, and he and Nadia get into it. She puts up a good fight, but he winds up dropping her with a whack to the face. Just as Rick Yune's about to move to Sydney, we hear Jack in the distance calling her name. Rick Yune wisely decides to get the hell out of there as Jack and the rest of the Apple boys make their way to the girls. Syd bends over to check on Nadia, then runs off. Nadia meets up with the boys and tells them that Syd went thatta way. They all chase after her. Syd heads into the cold storage area and tries to find Rick Yune in between hanging meat carcasses. Suddenly, a sword slices through a carcass, barely missing Syd's head.
And then they fight.
Fight fight fight. Spin spin spin. Dance with the devil in the pale moonlight. Slo-mo. Hook. Kick. Rick Yune's hot. Some Elektra action with a couple of meat hooks. A little sword action on Rick Yune's part. All nicely done. Then somehow (don't ask me how), Sydney manages to get the sword turned around and drives it through Rick Yune's torso. Guess he's not coming back this season either, huh? As Rick Yune dies, Syd bends over and asks him who hired him to kill her. He takes a dramatic pause and finally says, "Captain Kangaroo." No! He says, "Derevko. Irina Derevko." Of course he does. Did you have any doubt? I called that storyline before this series even BEGAN, dudes. Seriously. Rick Yune dies, leaving Syd to ponder whether you can really love a mother who repeatedly tries to kill you, even though she repeatedly fails.