Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: C+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Mothers & Fathers and Brothers & Suns
By Jacob Clifton | Season 1 | Episode 10 | Aired on 06.24.1999
To John's complaint that they're in the middle of nowhere and this tech is pretty useless for the PKs, Aeryn snarxposits that Crais -- "You might have noticed" -- is determined to track them down no matter where they are. Okay, but you might also have noticed that he's, again, wicked crappy at it. It took an actual vampire sorcerer to provide him with even a tiny bit of a clue, and that's sad from every angle. Consider, instead, prolonged contact with the deltoids of Commander John Crichton; or, if you like, Aeryn Sun wrapped around your neck. Chills multiplying and whatnot. They're complaining but not really.
D'Argo finds some kind of Peacekeeper control panel, and he and Pilot do an extended remix of the scene from Lethal Weapon III that John was telling Gilina all about, with extra interference on comms to make it extra-irritating for everyone concerned. "Which wire?" Not that one. "So this one?" No. Et cetera. Guess what? He pulls the wrong one -- a direct link to the propulsion unit -- and D'Argo gets electrocuted and goes all Goonies around in the insides of Moya.
Everybody runs around wondering where D'Argo is, and nobody knows where he is, and the DRDs are looking everywhere, and he was last seen bitching and moaning on tier twenty-one. D'Argo's in and out on comms, having found a PK device. Which he then kicks really hard, sending out the prenominate biomechanoid spermatozoa, which gets all over everything, as you know, and sends D'Argo sliding down the shaft again. John's not phallic, he's a teenager reaching for manhood; meanwhile, tentacle-faced D'Argo's slip-sliding all around Moya's insides covered in spaceship semen. I didn't write the episode but that's what we've got on our hands right now, so to speak, and there have been no credits yet. I guess it had to be either D'Argo or Aeryn, and D'Argo's the less-weird option, especially considering the role Aeryn will take in Talyn's creepy little Freudian worldview. "Pilot," John winces, "What tier is D'Argo on?" No tier at all. Meaning? D'Argo's floating about in space. Credits.
Aeryn takes her Prowler out to retrieve frozen D'Argo from space, and she brings him into the bay. Zhaan suggests restarting his respiration, and our favorite Boy Scout starts pounding hell of D'Argo's chest, to everybody's horror. "Hasn't he suffered enough?" asks Aeryn. Zhaan goes into overdrive: "Turn him! Turn him quick! Pulse is faint. Deep space internethermia." She explains that Luxans can handle space vacuum for like 15 minutes (Aeryn: "Maybe.") and then Moya starts freaking out and dipping in space, on top of everything else. "Come on big guy, come on. Give me one of those big nasty smelly breaths," John begs. Zhaan tells him to chill, and D'Argo takes a breath. Unfortunately, he is also completely out of it, calling Zhaan "Lo'Laan" and gazing at her lovingly. They ask about the PK device he found, but he's really trippy and not getting it, and then he passes out again. Moya wigs some more and John asks what's going on. "Something is wrong?" asks Pilot, and Aeryn starts to realize that Pilot's out of it too. So if Moya, Pilot, and D'Argo are all simultaneously losing it, that means our fate is up to Aeryn and Zhaan, basically. Which is just so scary. Pilot vaguely says he's "Working on it," as far as Moya's freakout, and Zhaan picks some "debris" off D'Argo. John and Aeryn take off for tier twenty-one, leaving Zhaan to deal with D'Argo's recovery.