Episode Report Card Jeff Long: A- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT I Want Candy
By Jeff Long | Season 5 | Episode 6 | Aired on 08.20.2008
Heidi greets the designers on the runway. She's carrying the lovely black velvet button bag. She says there is a special guest to tell them about their next challenge. Then, from behind the scrim, we see the silhouette of an enormous Hildegard-looking opera singer person. Rayon interviews that he was like, "What the fuck is that?" The mannequins are like, "Yo, Lee Strasberg, chill with the exact duplication of your earlier reactions. It makes us want to kill you even more." Then, the person starts laughing. It's Chris March from Season 4. You know, I like Chris and I don't mean to sound like I'm constipated or something, but the marketing of one's own laugh is something I find gross and embarrassing.
When the designers hear the laugh, they get who it is. Then, Chris enters from behind the scrim. He's wearing a drag outfit in the style of a German opera singer, except the bust has disco balls over the tits. Chris air kisses Heidi, because the boobs on his outfit are so big Heidi can't really reach him. Chris has fake eyelashes on that make his lids droopy, plus he's breathing heavily. He looks like he's about to drop dead. Chris greets everyone and Heidi says that he will be presenting the challenge. Chris says that, in case they haven't guessed it, they will be designing for drag queens. Blayne mumbles, "Too much drama," to himself. Everybody seems giggly and nervous. Except for Terri. She interviews that this is the challenge she has been waiting for because she loves drag queens. I don't know how much more I can love Terri, but she keeps pushing it. That's kind of amazing.
Chris explains that he has assembled a great group of ladies for the designer to work with. It's time to introduce them to the runway. A procession of some over-the-top drag queens begins on the runway. The designers seem shocked. Korto interviews that she was overwhelmed. The ladies are some big boys. Stella says, "This is a real tough one." Finally, we're all met.
Heidi greets the girls and asks them if they would like to introduce themselves. First, we have Farrah Moans. She's a in the style of Marilyn Monroe and says that, "If romance and glamour is your thing, then honey I'm your queen." Wow, this could take a while. Kenley sort of gasps and giggles at the same time at this. Next, is Miss Understood. She's a little bit punk and a little bit Phyllis Diller. She says that she eats sequins for breakfast. That can't be very easy to digest. Terri totally licks her teeth or Miss Understood. I totally believe that she has spent time around drag queens. She suddenly seems like she's right at home.