Episode Report Card Keckler: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT NUTS!
By Keckler | Season 1 | Episode 22 | Aired on 05.08.2007
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.Threaded throughout this episode is a narrative flashback of Eric and April's wedding, which is mainly about how Jake was a bad-boy, do-nothing loser who had to be pressed into Best Man service by Mom. Also, we get to meet the Late Grandpa Green, who turns out to be the life of the party, a larger-than-life, scotch-drinking, back-slapping, Emily-ogling, war-story-telling delight who doesn't get along too well with Ma Green. Why are so many of the awesome Greens dead or dying? Wait, I'm getting ahead of myself. With Dad firmly in charge, Jericho is strategizing about how to handle the impending New Bern attack. Meanwhile, Hawkins provides an awesome (AWESOME!) military satellite that he can use to track New Bernies' movements, and spends the first half of the episode back in his bunker, CB-ing his intel to Jake in the field. This isn't without its own drama, though, as someone *cough*Valenti*cough* tries to trace Hawkins's location through the satellite. The first battle is waged, where there seems to be a lot of shooting at the ground (pesky ground!) taking place, until The Tank makes an appearance and scares the thirty-some New Bernies into retreat. Sadly, the retreat doesn't matter as Dad gets shot and dies on the Richmond kitchen table after telling his boys how proud he is of them. Jake doesn't cry initially, but as soon as Emily shows her French-twisted hair (because it's good for war!), he wails and sobs and kisses all over her. But it's war kissing, so it doesn't matter. Also, Heather: alive! See, because at what we are led to believe is roughly the same time as the events in Jericho, an unconscious Heather is found and later wakes up at a Nebraska-based real military (as opposed to faux) camp. After initially impotently imploring the camp colonel to keep those Jericho walls from tumbling, Heather cheers when Camp Liberty, on orders from Valenti (VALENTI!), mobilizes to squelch the Kansas skirmish. See, Valenti wants to eliminate a "terror suspect" in the area, which is a huge and freakishly awesome DUN! The troops take off, leaving Heather staring up at a bizarre 21-star flag. Back in Jericho, Jake briefly (but AWESOMELY) tells the rest of his men that Dad wanted them to keep fighting, so that's what they're gonna do. Hawkins shows up to report that there's a New Bern train with hundreds of reinforcements headed their way. To deal with this new situation, Hawkins calmly asks to borrow the tank. No worries that there's no ammo (apparently), and don't bother to show him how to use it, because as Hawkins says, "It's not my first time." AWESOME! AWESOME! AWESOME! Connie offers Jake one last chance to surrender, but Jake tells him where to stick his mortar, and readies his troops. At the same time, Hawkins parks his ammo-free tank atop a hill and waits for the New Bernie train. Suddenly, a fleet of helicopters fly over Hawkins, whose face sinks in realization; Jake calls out "NOW!," and the screen goes black. Let the cliffhanging begin! Want more? The full recap starts right below!
With a hazy sunlight yellow sheen that signals memories or flashbacks, we get an eyeful of an ornate wedding cake. A probably sticky moppet in a pink flower-girl dress clutches a beribboned bouquet and jabs her finger in the frosting. What a little brat! If this was longer than six years ago, I'd think it was Emily. She's always sticking her finger in places it doesn't belong. The bratty moppet sucks the frosting off her finger and runs past people having their photo taken on a staircase. It's Mom, Dad, April, and a clean-shaven Eric. Oddly, Mom and Dad are posed in front, totally blocking the bridal couple and April's dress. "6 Years Ago" flashes on the screen as Pachelbel's Canon pipes. Because if the cake, the photos, the flowers, and the greedy brat of a flower girl didn't tip us off that this was a wedding, Pachelbel will. More futzing with the photographer, and Mom finally gets impatient and says if he doesn't hurry it up, he's going to be taking photos of her with her shoes off. Since no one wants hammertoes in a wedding photo, April advises Mom to make herself comfortable and notes that they can't really take the photos without the best man. Who is the best man? Jake. And where is the best man? No one knows, but given what we have been led to believe about Jake's past, he's probably off getting drunk, having sex, stealing cars, and gambling. The poor photographer keeps readjusting his camera every time a member of the wedding party moves, which they are doing constantly. Eric dourly notes, "Grandpa seems to be missing, too." Dad barks a laugh, asking them all to "take a wild guess where they are!" Mom rolls her eyes and stalks off just as the photographer's flash goes off. That's a keeper.
Mom walks outside, and suddenly we're back in the gray tones of present day. Oh, it's going to be one of those episodes, is it? A bunch of "meaningful" flashbacks juxtaposed against present day to illustrate how far they've all come, which will get so sappy we might as well pull up a stack of pancakes? Mom leaves Town Hall and sweeps her eyes over the rubble that was town square. She nabs a local and carries him off to do something at the Med Center just as T-tol, t-lot! the Super Skeet comes riding, riding up to the Town Hall door! Inside Town Hall, Jake reports to the usual suspects that New Bern took Talbot's farm with about seventy men. Dad determines that they are outmanned and outgunned, and they need to take a hard stand at a single farm to punish the New Bern army with casualties as much as possible. Dad points out that Richmond's farm, being the highest point in the whole area, is where they need to make their stand.