Episode Report Card Aaron: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT A Matter of Life and Death
By Aaron | Season 1 | Episode 11 | Aired on 08.11.2001
Flower class once again. Ruth has "improved" her original arrangement by shoving a bunch of ugly, tall, red flowers into the middle. She steps back and appraises her work. Deciding that she's not happy, she rips out the ugly, tall, red flowers, and replaces them with ugly, tall, purple flowers. There's yet another montage (this time backed with a cleverly re-mixed version of the opening credits) as she breathes from her crotch and all the other ladies gather round to admire her work.
Returning to plots that actually matter, we find David waiting outside the bar. The cab pulls up, but instead of David getting in, Wolverine gets out. It's Brad, and as David notes, he "looks...different from the picture." Brad explains that it's an old photo, and yeah, he really does look like Wolverine. Plus, Hugh Jackman is, like, the perfect name for a male prostitute anyway. Wolfie says several calculatedly disgusting things just so we know how low David is stooping here, and then demands $200 up front for his services. David only has $80, but Brad agrees to take it without any complaint. They argue for a moment about where they should do the deed; David doesn't want to bring a wolf-man back to his room. "Oh, I get it," says Brad. "Don't want to wake the wife?"
Cut to Brad and David macking, parking garage-style. I'll just describe this scene by saying that the people who were upset about not getting to see the gay sex a few weeks back no longer have anything to complain about. David also sends up a great big psychological warning flag by grunting, "You like that, don't you, faggot?" as he demonstrates his versatility. Suddenly, red and blue lights start flashing, and the cops arrive to break up the parking-lot party.
Down at the station, a dazed David is being fingerprinted. That task complete, the cop informs him that he gets one phone call. We see him dial, but we don't know who he's calling yet. Fade to white.
Morning in Vegas. David is escorted out of lock-up by a cop who hands him over to -- dun DUN dun -- Keith! David looks like shit, and Keith continues to lecture him about his self-destructive behavior. "Were you using condoms?" asks Keith, and David is forced to admit that he wasn't. Bad David! Bad David! I'm not even going to dignify the "does David have AIDS now?" tease they're going for here by mentioning it. Except for the part where I just did. Keith managed to get all the charges against David dropped, and he claims that he did it because he loves David. "But I won't ever do it again," he continues. Before he walks away for good, he counsels David to get some help. Man, where's Gayoda when you need him?