Episode Report Card Lady Lola: D | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT EGOT Game
By Lady Lola | Season 4 | Episode 7 | Aired on 12.03.2009
A few blocks away, Tracy visits Yakov's Nubian Bling Explosion to get something simple and elegant for Angie -- a gift that really speaks to his responsibility. That is, until he gets distracted by something shiny in the display case. It's a hideous-ass "One of a Kind" necklace with a blinged-out nameplate that says "EGOT." Yakov explains that it was once owned by Philip Michael Thomas, a.k.a. Tubbs from Miami Vice. He commissioned the necklace to inspire him to win the holy quadrangle of entertainment awards: An Emmy, a Grammy, an Oscar, and a Tony. Tracy gives up on the Christmas shopping and lays all his cash down for the EGOT necklace.
Lemon's office. Jack comes in to check that Lemon's prepared for Dealbreakers. It only serves to make her nervous, as he tells her it has to work. He makes suggestions about her personal appearance, at which time we learn that Lemon can't wear contacts because her eyes are too pointy. So Jack suggests Lasik and says the studio will pay for it. She hesitantly agrees. He says they're perfect before throwing it out there to change Lemon's name to Veronica St. Pierre. No, he decides, too much. Then he heads out, noting with an askew look that her hair is... fine.
Over in Tracy's dressing room, he plays Marco Polo with Grizz, Dot Com, and a samurai sword. Not dangerous at all! Angie comes in to collect the Christmas presents he got for the kids. He says there's no need. He got them all something better -- "I got us an EGOT necklace for me!" Angie says he just proved her point, but he insists that he's going to EGOT for all of them, especially little Chewbacquita Jordan. Angie takes him at his word and says she'll give him a daughter if he can win all the awards and prove how responsible he is.
Dr. Spaceman's office. The good doctor finishes up his "Lasig" treatment on Lemon and asks her to read the top line of a piece of paper across the room from them. She does: "Dear Dr. Spaceman, Thank you for your submission. The New England Journal of Medicine does not publish X-rated cartoons." Dr. Spaceman runs down her options for impulse treatments (face burn, bone morph, mouth peel), but Lemon tells him she can't do anything rash, looks-wise, since she is going to be on TV that week. Responds Dr. Spaceman, "Really? I think you mean radio." This unnerves Lemon, after Jack's little ants-in-the-pants dance earlier. Dr. Spaceman offers her something for her nerves, then remembers he's not allowed to have sex with his patients. He looks at her appraisingly once more and notes that her hair is... fine.