Episode Report Card Couch Baron: B- | 23 USERS: D+ YOU GRADE IT South Of The Border, Down Mexico Way...
By Couch Baron | Season 2 | Episode 11 | Aired on 01.24.2006
Deputy Sacks (who I've seen without the moustache, FYI, and yes, it makes a BIG difference) pokes his head into Lamb's office and tells him he's got company. When he hears it's the FBI, Lamb hangs up, takes a moment to brace himself, and then instructs Sacks to send them in. Lamb pretends to be engrossed in some report as two agents appear before his desk. When he looks up, there's a big black agent and a blonde Lucy Lawless. I'll leave it to you to determine which one's the more intimidating. Seriously, I was a major Xena addict for the entire run of the series, so this is going to be fun. Probably not quite as fun as if she back-flipped into the room while cleanly shaving off Sacks's moustache with her chakram, but I'll take what I can get. Xena introduces herself as "Agent Morris," and her partner says he's "Agent Wills." Lamb invites them to sit and dismisses Sacks. Once everyone's seated, Agent Xena says that they're willing to share resources. Lamb starts to make a reciprocal comment, but Agent Xena steamrolls on -- "until such time as you piss us off. And when that time comes -- and it usually comes quickly in Sleepyburg or World'sBiggestBallOfStringsville or wherever the hell we are this week -- when that time comes, we will cut you out like you were a meter maid." Hee hee hee. Lamb looks horrified, probably not least because he just caught a visual of himself writing parking tickets and getting his ass slapped by a bunch of beat cops. Agent Xena rolls on, telling Lamb to repeat after her. She says, "Team," and Wills holds his hands up high and wide. She continues, "Me," and Wills drops his hands and narrows the distance to a teeny-tiny space. She does it again, and Lamb obediently repeats after her. It's like Lamb's going to the slaughter. And I never thought Xena could kick more ass than she did on her eponymous show, but maybe it's because she now has a more fitting and less annoying sidekick. Agent Xena asks Lamb to bring them up to speed on the investigation. Lamb gapes and smiles sarcastically. Don't make them break out the Emasculating Hands again, Donnie.
Veronica arrives at the sheriff's station and asks the deputy on duty, a large black man I don't think we've seen before, where Lamb is. The guy is listed as "Super Huge Deputy" on IMDb, and it's only because this episode is so rife with shout-outs that I'm surprised they didn't go with "Big Black Sex Cop." SHD identifies Veronica, and says he's supposed to keep an eye on her. Veronica takes a seat, and SHD asks if she ever hits the clubs in L.A. She says she's only eighteen, so she only skulks around outside while her dad gets his dance on. Or something. SHD says that no club will care, and adds that he bounces at "Club Thin," and he'll totally get her in if she wants. This seems like an exceedingly clumsy way to set up a future plot point, but I'm not guessing SHD often gets hired for his subtlety.
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