Episode Report Card Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Once Upon A Time
By Demian | Season 3 | Episode 3 | Aired on 10.18.2000
Cut to the manor, where Prue and Phoebe barrel through the main hallway in an attempt to avoid the numerous doorways in the house. The Xylophone Of Pre-Adolescent Hijinks plinks merrily in the background as Prue drags Phoebe to call Kate on their walkie-talkies. The xylophone and the ladies are interrupted by the chiming of the doorbell. "Do you think trolls know about doorbells?" Prue asks, and the sisters creep to the door. Phoebe flings the door open to reveal Cole on the front porch, crouched so his eyes are at mail slot level. Phoebe sings out, "Cole!" as he rises up, then chastises him in baby-talk for meeting her at the house, when they had agreed to meet at the club. Prue tells him to get lost, and to close the door behind him as she whirls around with Phoebe to contact Kate. Cole halts them, noting he's got a long drive home, and asks if he could use their rest room. Giggles and "number two" "jokes" abound as the sisters reluctantly allow him in, telling him to make it quick. They're supposed to be nine years old, right? Not retarded? Whatever. Cole shoots them a look that clearly indicates he thinks they've been lobotomized, and we cut to the bathroom interior, where Cole carefully bolts the door from inside. He pauses, looks up, then pulls one of his trademark squiggles that teleports him up to the middle of the attic. He spies the BoS, grins, and moves towards it as we cut to the two Ps in the hall outside the bathroom.
Prue calls Kate on the walkie-talkie, and we cut to Kate, petrified in the darkness of her bedroom, clutching her receiver in one hand and Thistle's box in the other. Tedious child, if the trolls thrive in the shadows, turn on a couple of goddamned lights already. Idiot. Prue, who in spite of her dust-addled nonsense is becoming my favorite sister, tells the tedious child just that, noting that, because she and Phoebe have the key, the trolls will be gunning for them this evening, and Thistle and Kate will be safe. Kate's not having this, as she can hear the trolls circling her as well. Jump cut to the attic, where Cole approaches the stand holding the BoS. He moves his hand to grab it, but the book flares white and leaps to the floor. An expression of rank disgust crosses his face, which then morphs into his demonic visage, which numerous people in the forums have noted bears a striking resemblance to Darth Maul. Darth Maul with Spock ears. Darth Cole moves towards the book on the floor, only to have it skitter further away, eliciting a throaty growl from the demon. Cut to Prue and Phoebe, who hear the growl but misinterpret it as coming from the trolls hiding in the manor. "Let's go get 'em," simpers Prue, which brings the one and only smirk to my face thus far in this Freaky Friday plotline.
Cut back to the attic, where Phoebe and Prue burst through the door with a "Hee-YA," Prue apparently ready to pummel the trolls with her shoes. Darth Cole spins around, the two sisters freeze in surprise and fright, and Darth Cole squiggles back down to the bathroom. "That was a very big troll," pouts out Phoebe, but Prue corrects her, guessing the demon was after the BoS. Prue moves to replace the book on its pedestal as Phoebe retreats into the doorframe. An opportunistic troll immediately leaps down the front of her blouse to rummage around in her cleavage. He's supposedly simply searching for the key to Thistle's box, but manages to cop a good feel before darting out of Phoebe's shirt again. The troll trips Prue, who is rushing to aid her sister, and Phoebe and Prue are sent tumbling down the stairs to the landing outside the bathroom. Phoebe reaches for her neck and announces, in her normal vocal register, that "they got the key." Cole emerges in human form from the bathroom, asks Phoebe if she's all right, and we cut to commercial as the sisters gaze up guiltily from the floor.