Episode Report Card M. Giant: C+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Held Up
By M. Giant | Season 4 | Episode 4 | Aired on 01.09.2005
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.What a tangled web we weave. Kiefer poses as a gas station robber, hoping that in a few minutes he'll be able to let everyone go and resume following his TerrorMinion. It doesn't work. Driscoll tries to keep her unattended, schizophrenic daughter from having an episode by talking soothingly to her over the phone. It doesn't work. Potato Face tries to help Kiefer from inside CTU without getting busted. It doesn't work. Lispy Skip tries to help Potato Face without anyone else finding out. It doesn't work. DaD and DoDder stage a daring escape attempt. It doesn't work. Kiefer tries to get on with his day after taking a convenience store full of people, as well as an officer, hostage. It doesn't work. TerrorMom tries to convince TerrorTeen to kill his idiot girlfriend. It doesn't work. TerrorMom poisons Idiot Girlfriend's iced tea. And that? Works just fine. Is it too late to give Shohreh Agdashloo that Oscar after all? Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Previously on M. Giant's One-Man Death March: Secretary of Defense DaD was kidnapped by terrorists, who announced that they planned to try him and execute him on the internet. DaD told his DoDder to try to escape if she got the chance. TerrorTeen asked TerrorMom for help with the fact that TerrorDad wanted to question his idiot girlfriend about following him to the TerrorDome, and TerrorMom invited the girlfriend over her own sneaky self. Curtis distrusted Aisha. Driscoll ordered Kiefer to bring the Velveteen-Voiced Hostile in, but Kiefer insisted on trying to follow him to DaD. Even though Kiefer wasn't cooperating with CTU, Potato Face cooperated with Kiefer by secretly trying to set up a surveillance satellite to track VVH. But it took longer than she expected, so Kiefer decided to stall VVH by pretending to hold up the gas station where VVH was filling his tank. The following takes place between 10:00 AM and 11:00 AM.
MaskedKiefer has apparently been concentrating all his attention during the two minutes of previouslies trying to get VVH to raise his hands and back away into a corner of the store with the cashier and the rest of the customers, but he doesn't appear to succeed until we rejoin the action. VVH, clearly suspicious about the veracity of this "robbery," finally decides he has little choice but to obey. The gun looks real enough, after all. Kiefer grabs a can of shaving cream off a shelf and squirts a dollop onto the lens of a security camera, then tosses it to the cashier and orders him to do the same with the camera behind the counter. After ascertaining that nobody is working in the back, Kiefer takes off his mask. Because it's hot in California, and because you can't have the lead actor masked for an entire hour of television, and because Kiefer probably figures that even with several witnesses, his face defies description anyway.
At CTU, Curtis enters the DrisCube, where the boss has just learned that Witless has been brought to the ER in critical condition, and that the bodies of the two thugs Kiefer shot were found where the ambulance picked Witless up. Curtis figures out what must have gone down. When Driscoll says Kiefer and VVH are "still at large," Curtis suggests that in light of DaD's execution being less than three hours away (an hour less, to be exact), maybe they shouldn't concentrate so much on Kiefer and start following other leads instead. But Driscoll points out that their only other lead is getting what's left of his mind melted in an interrogation room. Of course, that's because she doesn't know about the train-crash passenger with a bullet in his chest and half a pair of handcuffs on his wrist, or the fact that TerrorTurk knows about the Briefcase and TerrorDad. But I'm sure someone will be on top of those things eventually. Driscoll wants everyone to concentrate on looking for Kiefer and VVH.