Episode Report Card Sara M: D+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Annie's BlocKKK Party
By Sara M | Season 8 | Episode 7 | Aired on 11.02.2003
Kevin asks the crowd if they have any questions. Since this is Glenoak, Land of the Stupid, they most certainly do. First up is Asslee's dad, who -- after expositing all of Kevin's fabulous off-screen safety tips, which include getting better outdoor lighting and leaving the lights on when on vacation (apparently, Kevin also works for the Glenoak Electric Company) -- asks if there are any further ways to be safe. Some old guy stands up and says that Asslee's dad is talking about buying guns. "No, I'm not!" Asslee's dad whines. "Well, I am!" says the old guy. I have a feeling the old guy and I are going to become good friends. Kevin does not recommend getting guns. Old guy protests that this will leave him defenseless. Kevin tells him to just call the police. "What if the robbers don't let me 'call the police'?" the old guy asks, thinking he has outsmarted Officer Kevin. Which he has, but it's not like that's any kind of big accomplishment. The occupants of the room titter. Through a focus so soft I thought I was watching Star Trek for a second, Kevin lectures on the evils of guns. During this, we see a shot of RevCam looking like he's trying not to fall asleep. You'd think, considering that he is probably the only person in the room who's actually been shot, he'd be a little more into this, but no. Kevin says that more often than not, the victim's gun is used against him. Old guy doesn't understand how this is possible when he's planning to shoot the robber first. Old guy might be a scary man to have living in your neighborhood, but he's a welcome addition to this show. Kevin passes his business card, which lists every phone number he can possibly be reached at, out to the old guy and other meeting attendees, and says to call him anytime if anyone ever needs him. This seems to satisfy the old guy, and he sits down.
Kevin ends the meeting, and everyone applauds politely. Annie claps with great enthusiasm, then jumps up to remind everyone to come to her stupid block party. Kevin leaves the room to answer a page from the station. He walks by RevCam and the old guy, who's asking if the block party will cost him anything. RevCam says it will not. Totally not listening, old guy says that he's on a fixed income and can't afford to attend a party for people he doesn't know. Then he says that "Mildred told Harry that Jim said" that the party is being thrown to welcome the Duprees to the neighborhood. Couldn't the writers at least try to think of some names that weren't popular in the '50s? Even the Muslim girl is called "Jill." The old guy asks RevCam pointed questions about who the Duprees are and where they come from. RevCam says he thinks they came from across town. Old guy says that their last name implies that they're from somewhere "a lot farther away." It does? Really? Well, Wing Chun's last name is "Ariano" -- does that mean that she's originally from Italy? Or does Brenda need to realize that just because someone doesn't have a white-bread Mayflower passenger name like "Hampton," he or she isn't automatically from another country? Eric tries to escape from the old guy, but is unsuccessful. Kevin walks up to Asslee's frogdaddy and tells him that they need to go, and they'll talk in the car. A nearby Lucy feigns concern. I really hope Kevin's news has something to do with Asslee dying and me never seeing her again.