Episode Report Card Jeff Long: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Vision
By Jeff Long | Season 1 | Episode 2 | Aired on 12.07.2004
Most of the designers seem to be doing a fairly good job talking with the prospective bidders. We see both Kara Saun and Austin get complimented. Starr is shown explaining her piece to a woman, and we learn that the lumpy things on the shoulders are supposed to be LUMPS. Like tumors! Oh God, Starr. That's not very pretty to talk about, is it? ["Also, Comme Des Garçons five years ago much?" -- Wing Chun] Jay sees some women looking at dresses on the racks behind his mannequin (they are regular retail items, not part of the auction) and marches up to them and demands, "Why are you people looking at this stuff?"
The lady who got the lump talk from Starr really likes Nora's piece. We also see her talking to Jay, who tells her, "Vote for Jesus." When the auction is finished, Wendy tells Austin that this challenge showed off her weaknesses: marketing and self-promotion. If only this had been a fashion espionage mission. Outside, Jay reiterates his wish that he'd not dressed like Jesus. He reasons that people are made very uncomfortable by "religious icons": "They don't want to talk to Jesus."
The next day is the runway show. Tim wishes the designers all luck. We see all of the models getting dressed. As well, we see Austin doing a little makeup work on himself.
On the runway, Heidi replays last week's spiel about being in or out. She reminds us that Austin is safe this week. She introduces the judges: Nina Garcia from Elle, Paul Berman, and Constance White, the style director for eBay. I guess eBay has diversified, because I'm not seeing the need for a style director at an internet auction place. Does she make phone calls to random people saying, "Fur is in this season. Sell your coat"? She's really pretty, though. The designers will be judged on originality, wearability, and concept. And the show begins.
Robert's piece is first, and it's hot. It's a super-tailored pant suit, in a rust color with orange accents. The pants are patterned in an exaggerated pin-stripe, and the top is low-cut with lapels. It looks absolutely gorgeous on the model, Melissa. It's practically painted on her. She has a scarf tied around her neck to resemble a man's neck tie, and is carrying a cigar. Robert himself, however, has chosen to wear his hair in cornrows today. He looks like Juliette Lewis. No.
Kevin's outfit is next. It looks like a black sack with the shoulder cut out. The model's legs are shown to great advantage, to which he alludes in a voice-over as the connection to the "envy" theme. I guess. There's some intricate beading and stuff near the shoulder and the bottom, but it doesn't seem all that wearable.