Episode Report Card Jessica: B+ | 11 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT ...Must Come To An End (2)
By Jessica | Season 6 | Episode 24 | Aired on 05.13.2003
Anyway, Dawson sets Jen up in front of the video camera and she makes this video for her baby and…well, I totally cried. I'm not made of stone. Dawson listens and watches and looks sad as Jen records her last words to her daughter. "Hi Amy, it's Mom," she begins. "Well, by the time you see this, I won't be here anymore, and I know how much that sucks. For both of us. So, seeing as how I won't be around to thoroughly annoy you, I thought I would give you a little list of things that I wish for you. Well, there's the obvious: an education. Family. Friends. And a life that is full of the unexpected. Be sure to make mistakes. Make a lot of them. Because there's no better to learn and to grow, all right? And I want you to spend a lot of time at the ocean, because the ocean forces you to dream and I insist that you, my girl, be a dreamer. God. I never really believed in God. In fact, I spent a lot of time and energy trying to disprove that God exists. But I hope that you are able to believe in God, because the thing that I've come to realize, sweetheart, is that it just doesn't matter if God exists or not. The important thing is for you to believe in something, and I promise you that that belief will keep you warm at night, and I want you to feel safe always." She takes a deep breath. Dawson looks awfully blue, standing behind the camera. "And there there's love. I want you to love to the tips of your fingers. And when you find that love, wherever you find it, whoever you choose, don't run away from it. But you don't have to chase after it, either. You just be patient and it'll come to you, I promise, when you least expect it. Like you. Like spending the best year of my life with the sweetest and the smartest and the most beautiful baby girl in the world." Sniffles. What? Shut up. I'm weak. I'm a weak, sappy, hormonal woman. "You don't be afraid, sweetheart, and remember to love is to live," Jen finishes. She smiles sadly up at Dawson, who looks mildly perturbed. Michelle Williams is doing a great job in this episode.
Back in her hospital room, Pacey and Jen have some quality time. He takes a tape that he stole -- or, er, "borrowed" -- from Dawson back in 1998, and pops it into the VCR. It's a video of the two of them and Joey and Dawson fooling around -- it's actually footage from the original credits -- set to "Hand In My Pocket," which I believe was the original theme song. Jen and Pacey wistfully watch their younger selves frolic. "Oh God, we were so cocky. You, anyway," Jen says. She was so much prettier than I realized at the time. "Such a long time ago," she says. Pacey, staring at the monitor, agrees. Jen smiles at him. "I recognize a Joey trance when I see it," she says, and asks if he can still feel the sparks. Pacey grins that he could never really deny the sparks. Which is, as anyone who's felt them knows, is the beauty of the spark as a concept. "When she's around, I just feel more alive," he says. "People underestimate how important that is." Jen smiles, and says that they overestimate it, too. "You can't rely on someone else to make you feel alive." It comes from within. Like gas. "So do you plan on borrowing her or stealing her from your best friend?" Jen asks, although not snidely. Pacey says that it's different now, mostly because, this time, he totally hates Dawson. Jen says that she just wants them to stay in touch, and never forget what they mean to each other. "Because friendship can really never be over- or underestimated," Jen says, then starts to wheeze and cry. "Oh, god, I hate this. I'm so angry," she grits out. "I'm so angry, I don't want to do this. I don't want to die. I hate this. Remind me never to do it again. That's not funny. I'm losing my sense of humor," she wheezes. Pacey just looks at her sympathetically. "I don't want to leave my daughter. I don't want to leave her alone," Jen sobs. Pacey looks her right in the eye and promises that Amy is not going to be alone. "Saturday night has me and Amy's name written all over it. We will take care of your baby, I promise you," he assures her. Pacey is so dreamy and responsible. And I am old, because I now think that "responsible" is super-hot.