Episode Report Card Deborah: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT The Wages Of Sin
By Deborah | Season 2 | Episode 6 | Aired on 10.28.2004
Joan's helping sort clothes at the church; Helen and Lily are there. Joan notices a tattoo on Lily's arm and asks, "Is that a sailor?" Lily smiles: "Hot, huh? He, uh, waves when I flex." Joan: "Mom, if a nun can get one…" Helen: "Ex-nun. Very ex. Sort." Lily: "People have been doing body art for 4,000 years. It's very spiritual." Helen: "Oh, [I] like how you're helping. Thank you very much." Joan: "A belly ring!" Helen: "Sort." Lily asks Joan, "What are you in for?" Helen says Joan just wanted to help. Lily figured it must have been the community service aspect of some sentence. Joan says she has skills in economic theory: "I just finished Wealth of Nations. You know Adam Smith, right?" Lily: "The sixth Beatle?" I can't tell if Lily's pulling her leg or not. Neither can Joan: "No. Eighteenth-century money stud. He, like, totally blew away Benjamin Franklin with this --" Lily's suddenly reminded of why she hated school. Joan looks around, disappointed that there aren't more clothes. Helen says it's a small church, and they can only do so much. Joan: "You know, expansion increases returns. Why don't I open up a branch at school?" Helen wonders if Joan has time for that. Joan thinks so, and she starts naming places she'd put bins -- the hallway, the cafeteria: "Oh, two near the gym: the cheerleaders never wear anything twice. I'm gonna go talk to Chadwick." She takes off. Lily asks Helen, "Has she ever been drug tested?" Helen just smiles like the idea's crossed her mind more than once.
Kevin wheels through a hallway and runs into Beth and some guy. She introduces him to Pete, explaining that she and Kevin went to high school together and that Kevin writes for The Herald now. Pete: "My client was nowhere near the scene of the crime." Kevin, to Beth: "Knock off a bank?" Beth says it's embarrassing: "Open container violation. I walked out of a party with a beer. That's not on the record, is it?" Kevin smiles and shakes his head. Pete says it's a pretty splashy headline: "College Student Drinks Beer." Yep, that's right up there with "Recapper Rolls Eyes And Swears." Kevin: "Could be my Pulitzer." Pete's beeper goes off and he firms up plans to see Beth at 9:00, adding, "Be there or I'll double my fees," before he goes. They watch him go and then Kevin gives Beth a questioning look. Beth explains that Pete does standup at a club called The Laugh Riot and she promised to check out his act. Kevin: "Remember the prom when I made you laugh so hard, Coke poured out of your nose like you were a soda fountain?" Um, ew. That sounds attractive. Also implausible. Beth laughs and says she ruined her dress. Kevin: "You said no one ever made you laugh like me." Beth doesn't know how to respond to that. Kevin just beams at her adorably. She says she's late for poli sci: "It was good to see you again. Say hi to your folks." As she walks away, Kevin jokes, "Oh, and watch out for the long arm of the lawyer." Frink: "That's a stretch, dude." Yes, I groaned too. Why shouldn't you all suffer along with me?