Episode Report Card Lady Lola: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Smack Talk for Dummies
By Lady Lola | Season 4 | Episode 3 | Aired on 10.29.2009
Out in the corridor, Tracy finds Jack and pleads him to send him away so he won't fall victim to the Rules of Threes. Jack scoffs, just as Tracy once did.
Back in the writers' room, Jenna manages to drop the ultimate Lost spoiler (hint: it ends like Newhart, with Hurley in the bed) while trying to bond with the guys. They head into the men's room to speculate why she's suddenly trying to be buddy-buddy to with them. Frank is on to her scheming and says they'll get rid of her through a series of pranks. Just then, Jenna barges in and says, "Oh wow! They painted the ceiling in here!" Heh.
Somewhere on the drive between Midtown and Stone Mountain, Jack once again gives Lemon the pep talk about finding a "real American" down in Georgia. Lemon tries to debate him as to whether one part of America can be more real, or more American, than another, but she gets distracted by a restaurant called Fatty Fat's Sandwich Ranch and literally grabs the wheel to force him to turn over. Jack continues to portray Lemon as a snobby, East coast-er, so she explains her fundamental philosophy about life. Everyone wants to enjoy their own "sandwich," if you will, and it's no place of hers to put down another's "sandwich." As such, she tries to embody her own "live and let eat" philosophy by ordering that she doesn't realize contains extra pig grundle. Of course, Jack, having learned a thing or two about Georgia culture, knows what she's doing. An evil smile spreads across his face.
Back at 30 Rock, Tracy hovers over Kenneth as he trolls the internet for another celebrity death: "Who knows, maybe Andy Dick has died in the last 20 seconds." Fair play, Mr. Jordan. Tracy decides to take matters into his own hands and calls Betty White, who, it must be noted, is reading Jimmy Carter's From Peanut to President. As soon as she picks up, he shouts into the phone, hoping to literally scare her to death. No dice. He asks about her health with such specificity that she realizes he's calling to see if she's going to take his place in the Rule of Threes. She assures him she'll outlive them all.
Back down in Georgia, Lemon and Jack have arrived at the hotel. Lemon is struggling with the realization that the carp sandwich "is not agreeing with [her] worldview." The receptionist comes forward and takes his sweet time -- not like them always rushin' city folk -- in getting them the keys to their rooms. As Lemon's butt cheeks expel sounds not dissimilar to a beagle's whining, Jack worsens matters, intentionally, by asking about the local peach festival. The receptionist launches into a Bubba-style exhaustive list of all the different uses for peaches (peach jerky?). Lemon finally gets the key and makes a run for it. Jack tries for brownie points with the clerk by blasting rude types like Lemon. He succeeds... kind of.