Episode Report Card Cindy McLennan: A | 193 USERS: A- YOU GRADE IT PANjandrum
By Cindy McLennan | Season 3 | Episode 8 | Aired on 11.17.2013
Neverland. Present day. As Henry keeps a watchful eye, Peter Pan gently lays Wendy down on a jungle-side cot. Apparently she's no longer too much of a contagion danger to be that near to the Lost Boys and Pan's camp, but Henry is 11, so what does he know from germ theory? When Henry asks about Wendy's condition, Pan says he fears she's doing worse. Henry asks, "But what if I save magic -- she'll live?" Pan says yes, then tells the boy that if he saves magic, he'll save them all. "But to do it, you have to truly believe." Wendy lets out a fake cough, that I'd never buy -- not even at 6:00 AM, and ask my daughter, I'm ready to buy any excuse at 6:00 AM, so long as I don't have to argue. What's that you say? When you grow up, you want to be a pole dancer? Very well, then. Follow your dreams. Henry assures Pan he does believe. Pan: "Good, because we don't have much time. Follow me."
Pan leads Henry back to his camp, proper and announces: "My brothers, tonight, the dream of Neverland will awaken from its slumber. Tonight, the heart of the truest believer shall fulfill its destiny." As what, a good main course accompanied by fava beans and a nice Chianti? Pan's been talking over me this whole time. His main point is: "Tonight, Henry saves magic." His "for me" is implicit. The Lost Boys cheer.
In another part of Neverland, Rumpy holds Pandora's Box as he leads Regina through the jungle. She says that despite their differences, she can always count on him to get things done; the others are just a liability. "Pan told them Neal was alive, and of course Emma took the bait. Such a waste of time." Regina takes a beat to remember herself. "Oh, I'm sorry." Rumpy tells her not to be. "He is alive." Regina is all, "WHAT?" Rumpy confirms he's seen his son alive, right on the island. Regina can't believe he saw his son and then parted ways. "You realize he might have a way off the island." Rumpy tells her they'll worry about their travel plans after they get Henry. Regina knows there's something he's leaving out. He tells her all she needs to know is that the next time they'll see Baelfire is when Rumpy is putting Henry in his arms. "When father and son are reunited." I think Rumpy's forgotten his audience here. Regina's hooded glare backs me up. We flash back to the...
Enchanted Past. Papa Stiltskin knocks on a door. Wee Rumpy asks where they are. When there's no answer, Papa opens the door and reveals two spinning spinsters who finish each other's sentences. Our lovely and talented forum members speculate that they're two of the three Fates. Who am I to disagree? Papa is dumping his child with the spinsters, while he goes off in search of what he claims is real work. I already don't believe him. He ignores wee Rumpy's tearful objections and pleas, and tries to placate him by giving him a straw doll. Papa tells the boy the doll will be with him, when he can't be. He advises Rumpy to give it a name. "Names always make things better. They make them real. Trust me." What a lovely echo of the Rumpelstiltskin tale. Papa tells his son the doll will protect him. "And I'll be back before you know. I promise." While the spinsters have been kindly and welcoming to the child, their expressions make it clear they are familiar with the stench of Papa's bullshit. Once he's out the door, wee Rumpy sobs. We cut to a...