Episode Report Card Cindy McLennan: C+ | 4 USERS: C YOU GRADE IT I Dream Of Sidney
By Cindy McLennan | Season 1 | Episode 11 | Aired on 01.29.2012
Storybrooke, Night, Mayor's Office: Emma and Sidney drive up to City Hall in her little yellow bug. Emma breaks a window. The alarm sounds. She does the math for Sidney about how long they have to search for evidence before Regina is alerted by the alarm company, shows up, and busts them (six minutes). Emma heads right for Regina's computer. She inserts a USB stick into the drive and calls up all files related to the tract of land Regina just bought from Gold. And then, trying to prove to me that she is too fricking stupid to live, Emma starts printing out all those documents, even though she just put a USB stick in the drive, and so she could download the files, take them home, and print them out somewhere else where she is far less vulnerable to detection. Ms. Head? Meet Ms. Desk. Thunk thunk thunk.
While rifling through Regina's desk, Emma also finds a large key ring, loaded with the keys that must open all those heart-vaults she has hidden under her father's crypt, right? Emma takes notices of them, but only barely, because she's focused on finding Henry's Once Upon A Time book. It's not long before Regina shows up and confronts Emma and Sidney. Emma lies that Sidney saw some kids break into City Hall and called her. Regina doesn't seem fooled, but she lets Sidney and Emma get away with it, which should be another huge tip-off for Emma.
Enchanted Forest, Knifingham Palace: Genie delivers the box to Queenie. She's soooooooooooo in love with him she cannot stand it. Oh, bitch. Please! She blathers about there being no escape. Genie presents her with the box and says her daddy says it holds the key to her freedom. Regina unlocks it to reveal the Agrabahn Viper, which can kill with a single bite, so it's basically overkill, since it has two heads, and hence two mouths, and more hence-ing -- two sets of fangs. What's more important is that it is the worst bit of CGI I have seen on this show, so far. The clunky CGI in the Enchanted Forest usually doesn't bother me. I sort of like it, usually, because it adds to the surreal quality of our Fairy Tale Universe, but this is just insulting. Anyhow, being the Genie of Agrabah, Genie knows all too well of the viper's venom. When Queenie pretends she is going to allow it to bite her and free her...to death, Genie stays her hand, and instead proposes using the viper to kill the king. Regina pretends she is all shocked that Genie would do this for her, but c'mon.
Storybrooke, Granny's Diner: The MYSTERIOUS STRANGER finds Henry furiously scribbling away. He's making notes of what he can remember from his lost book. The MYSTERIOUS STRANGER says, "Must be a hell of a book." And okay, my pet theory is not unique, but still, I'll sum it up. I think the MYSTERIOUS STRANGER is probably the little boy who found Emma, and I also think he has an enchanted typewriter, and that enchanted typewriter probably enabled him to write the Once Upon A Time book, and he has an inkling that it's fact, not fiction. Anyhow, when the MYSTERIOUS STRANGER asks Henry what the book's all about, Henry is all, "Stuff." Henry wants to know why the MYSTERIOUS STRANGER is in Storybrooke and doesn't buy his explanation that he's there for writing inspiration. "You can write, anywhere. What are you really doing here?" The MYSTERIOUS STRANGER replies, "Stuff," wishes Henry luck with his stories, and saunters off.