Episode Report Card M. Giant: A- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Gypsies, Vamps, and Beams
By M. Giant | Season 14 | Episode 3 | Aired on 03.01.2009
Kris and Amanda have finished loading their cart and are on the move, with Amanda joining the driver on the seat up front while Kris sort of runs alongside watching for shit to fall off. Which it does, and with some plenitude. There go an occasional table and a car muffler, for instance. Kris starts piling stuff back on. Kisha and Jen arrive at the Roma Detour just as the Whites are getting moving, Mike trying to keep a bumper from falling off. An old lady is cracking up watching this. I say "old lady," but of course she might be my age for all I know.
Team Family Law and the Flight Attendants are arriving at the starting point for "Vampire Remains" at about the same time. Victor talks about the clue telling them to take the "marked path." Once in the woods, Victor spots a trail blaze on a tree: a vertical red stripe flanked by white stripes. So he decides that's what they need to follow. "It usually is red and yellow," Tammy points out, quite reasonably. Victor doesn't care; that's what they're following, because he says so. Meanwhile, the Flight Attendants have found a set of much more TAR-looking markers in the form of red-and-yellow arrows on signposts stuck into the ground. Guess which team reaches the right place first? Yes, it's the Flight Attendants, while Victor and Tammy follow some Romanian park service trail straight uphill, at his continued insistence. Christie and Jodi try to lift their coffin and find it's pretty heavy, but at least they're better off than Tammy and Victor. She's trying to tell him they're following the wrong markers. "We don't know that yet," Victor says, and goes on ahead. The question is, when will they know? And when they do, what if it's too late to go back? All these questions and more will be answered in due time, but don't expect the answers to make sense.
The Stuntmen arrive at the Romany camp, where a guy is riding some kind of three-wheeled contraption suspended on a wire. It's hard to explain, and it seems like a fairly limited form of transportation. Still en route, the cheerleader in pink says of their cabdriver, "I just have to breathe, 'cause I'll snap." Hate to see what that would look like. She gets pissy when the driver can't seem to understand the person he stops and asks for directions. "You're speaking the same language," she grumps at him. Try fingerspelling, then, Annie Sullivan.
Amanda's wearing a leather cowboy hat that belongs to one of the Roma men as they arrive at the new place and begin unloading. Kris mentions that he doesn't have his Amazing Purse (although he insists on referring to it as his "fanny"), and Amanda says they'll get it later. They'll need to hurry with that, because Mike and Mel are not far behind. Nor do they have as much shit falling off their cart.