Episode Report Card Keckler: C | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Night of the Living Dread
By Keckler | Season 1 | Episode 20 | Aired on 04.02.2002
They must've all made with the nice-nice with the Onesies, because later that night, one of them -- who kinds of looks like C.C. Capwell from Santa Barbara gone to seed -- tells the Enterprise crew how they happened to crash on the planet. They were attacked while on their way back from their colony on Kotara Barath. Quantum asks who attacked them. "They didn't introduce themselves, they just opened fire," the C.C. Capwell Onesie tells Quantum. Odo says, "We're a supply ship. We don't carry large weapons. We tried to defend ourselves." A female Onesie speaks up, saying, "The captain was able to make a crash landing. It's a miracle we all survived." Mayweather asks if they sent out a distress signal, but C.C. Capwell tells him that they didn't want to be detected by their attackers. "So you set up this dampening field to hide," Trip states. The other Onesies nod. T'Pol asks how long they've been there, and Odo says, "Nearly three years." Quantum comments that they've "made quite a home for [themselves]" in three years. C.C. Capwell says they didn't have much choice. "Well, you do now," Quantum tells him. "Our ship is big enough for all of you. We can take you home." C.C. Capwell says, "You're very generous, Captain, but our world's over a year away."
Mayweather steps forward passionately and says they can't just leave them there. "As you say, we've made a home for ourselves," C.C. Capwell reminds him. Quantum -- and I can't believe I didn't broker a deal with Bunting to get paid a buck every time I type this -- FURROWS HIS BROW and asks his Chief Engineer how the Onesies' engines are. Trip reports, "Their dilithium matrix is stable. They've got plenty of anti-matter reserves. I think we can git this ship flyin'." Odo stands up and says they've already tried. "We have resources you may not have," Quantum pesters. "It's worth a shot." Odo nods and thanks him. Now, it would be at this point that Troi would say, "I sense they are hiding something, sir." Although I did notice that she went from being extremely intuitive with every creature they came across -- almost to the point of knowing what they had for breakfast -- to just being able to "sense that something isn't right."
Trip does some stuff to their systems. In an anemic attempt to recreate mysterious creepiness, Trip is made to hear a noise. He investigates a dark, dark corner but doesn't see anything. When he turns around, he sees the bug-eyed girl he met in the forest of Arden. He jumps and makes startled noises. I can see why she might scare people. Those eyes, dude. "You startled me," Trip tells her, just in case his startled noises didn't get the point across. "That's twice in one day." Bug-Eyed Girl doesn't say anything. "You ever say anythang?" Trip asks. Still nothing from Bug-Eyed. "Unless yer unable to say anythang," Trip hypothesizes, "in which case, I apologize." Trip edges around her and goes back to his workstation. Bug-Eyed follows and watches him work. Suddenly she blurts out, "Don't touch that!" Trip stops what he's doing. "The power's been routed to our living area through that relay -- it's very dangerous," Bug-Eyed tells him. Trip says, "Well, I'm glad you finally decided to speak up. Thanks." Yeah, good thing Trip was just mucking about in there, not really knowing what the hell he was doing. Trip gives her his million-dollars'-worth-of-Edam smile and asks if she knows a lot about her ship's systems. Bug-Eyed tells him that her father's the engineer, and he taught her how things work. I love those books. Trip tells her, "Stick around, then. You can warn me about whatever else I need to keep my hands off of." How about her dinners for two? The female Onesie from earlier appears and says, "He's busy. Don't bother him, Liana." Bug-Eyed Liana looks disappointed, and Trip assures Female Onesie that she's no bother. "My daughter has other responsibilities," Female Onesie says. Bug-Eyed Liana leaves, but manages to cast a come-hither look over her shoulder at Trip. Do you know how we know the Onesies are aliens? They have little nearly imperceptible dots congregating around each temple. It's a way to make them not-human but still attractive enough in case one of the crew of Enterprise wants to have a fling.
Trip and T'Pol work on the grounded ship's systems. T'Pol notes the cross-circuitry, and Trip explains that Bug-Eyed and her engineer father rerouted power according to their needs. "Efficient," T'Pol comments, "but I'll need to reconnect the bridge systems." Trip says he'll get Bug-Eyed to help her. T'Pol tells him it's unnecessary. "It'll go faster," Trip argues. "I can take care of it," T'Pol states, getting up. "She knows the ship's system inside and out. She kept me from getting fried on a live plasma feed," Trip says. "Perhaps she can help you then," T'Pol says pointedly. "What's that supposed to mean?" Trip whines. "By the way you keep talking about her, you obviously appreciate her 'technical' expertise," T'Pol explains. Bamp-chicka. Trip crosses his arms and says, "She's very competent." "So was the female engineer on the Xyrillian ship," T'Pol says. Wah wah. "Yer never gonna let that go, are yeh?" Trip snits. "I'm simply noting that the last time you found someone this competent you wound up carrying her child," T'Pol reminds him. A lot of people seem to think that this was a scene of simmering jealousy on T'Pol's part. I couldn't disagree more. First of all, need I remind everyone that she's a freakin' Vulcan and doesn't experience jealousy? Second of all, I see T'Pol playing the exact same role with Trip and Quantum and their dalliances that Spock did with Kirk and his. She's merely calling them on the obvious and raising her eyebrow at it. Just because she happens to be female doesn't automatically mean that the exact same observations which Spock, a male, made are now stemming from a feeling of sexual competition with every female any of her male crewmembers happen to take a personal interest in. Jeez, give her a little more credit.