Episode Report Card Cate: B+ | 3 USERS: B YOU GRADE IT Drunk
By Cate | Season 6 | Episode 13 | Aired on 02.03.2002
Ruthie leaves, and Dopey confronts Simon again, upset that he's still planning to attend the party. Simon tries to reassure him by saying, "Remember, I was raised by Eric and Annie Camden, the uber-parents of Glenoak." Wait a second. Uber-parents? I'm going to take that as a shout-out to the man who designed the fine web site you're perusing right now. Thanks, Brenda! Dopey tries to get Simon to heed the lessons to be learned from the legendary story of Mary "Half-Pint" Camden, who was also raised by the CamRents. Simon just rolls his eyes and walks away. Dopey, presumably, goes off to harass someone else.
Simon knows that to whip his date into an anticipatory frenzy, he has to keep him waiting. Morris is down in the CamKitchen, looking uncomfortable while the CamRents drink tea and smile at him. Maybe he's feeling awkward because he forgot Simon's corsage in the car, or because the CamRents never offered him any tea or invited him to sit down. In any case, the conversation is not exactly flowing. Simon comes down and tries to make a hasty exit with Morris, but Annie stops them by asking Morris about his intentions. Morris looks a little taken aback, perhaps wondering if Annie really thinks he and Simon are dating. Annie clarifies by asking him if he intends to drink or smoke. I can see why she'd have an interest in his fitness to drive her son in a car, but whether he intends to smoke is really none of her business. She proceeds to lay on a guilt trip and asks for Morris's promise that he will watch out for Simon at the party. Poor Simon looks embarrassed as hell by all this, while Morris looks a little creeped out. Perhaps he's realizing just how dangerously unstable Annie really is. Simon starts to leave, staring incredulously at his parents. He stops and says, "Oh, and don't put the whole family in the van and follow me to this party, okay?" Annie and Eric smile at him, obviously reliving the joyful memories of some of their finest stalking ever. With the happy couple gone, RevCam tries to reassure Annie that Simon will be okay. She replies, "Well, if he isn't, I'm going to hold you personally responsible." That's really great of her to give her permission yet reserve the right to blame her husband if anything should go wrong. That's some fine parenting there.
Over at the big bash, Morris offers to get his date a soda. Simon gratefully accepts, then stands around smiling self-consciously. Tom and Mike come over and ask him if he's having a good time. Simon excitedly replies, "Oh, I'm having a great time. I really like hanging out with you!" Mike comments that the real party is "out back." Huh? What could possibly be "out back"? It looks like the beer is already in the house, so what's left? Considering it's two guys who want to lead Simon outside, it's possible they want to show him a girl who's going to jump out of a cake. However, it's far more likely that they're inviting him out for a circle jerk.