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Episode Report Card Kim: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT How Am I Supposed to Lift Without You?

By Kim | Season 11 | Episode 4 | Aired on 09.28.2010

Macy's Stars of Dance. It's a modern number with contortionists, a ballerina, and wire work. Not my bag. I don't watch this show to see modern dance. More ballroom and Latin please.

Seal is here to perform. He's still putting out music? I thought his profession was now impregnating Heidi Klum. I guess someone has to put out music for Delilah to play on her nationally syndicated radio program. Have you guys ever listened to Delilah? I love that shit. I unapologetically, unironically love Delilah. She'll give you advice and then play a special song for you! That's service. Ask Amy doesn't do that shit. While Seal sings, Lacey, Kym, Chelsie, and Cheryl come out to dance. The whole routine is kind of like Seal is the maypole and they are a bunch of wood nymphs dancing around him. It doesn't really go with the song, but no one cares.

Clip package on how competitive the stars are. Margaret -- not really. Kurt -- very. Everyone else -- somewhere in between. Yawn.

Let's find out the results for a few more couples. As already discussed, Michael and Chelsie got some harsh remarks and terrible scores. Kurt, on the other hand, did really well. Rick was told that he was a contender. Margaret was, in my opinion, way underscored. Her jive needed more bounce, but it was still good. So, results. Who is safe? Kurt and Anna! I'm telling you, he is going to be around for a while. Now watch him tank next week. Joining them next week are Margaret and Louis. I think they might have a bigger voting base than some people realize. They've got the gays. Who else are they going to vote for? Bristol? Hardly. We don't find out more results until after the break.

I keep seeing commercials for that movie "Life As WE Know It" (which looks horrible and rote) and thinking, "Wasn't there already something with that title?" Turns out there was a TV show, and I recapped it for all of two episodes. And Kelly Osbourne was in it playing the "fat girlfriend," so there's even a link back to this show. Who knew?

After the break, Brooke interviews Michael solely so he can get a chance to say that Bruno's a dick. I mean, he doesn't use those words, but that's the subtext. I'm guessing Michael's going home tonight; otherwise, why would they have interviewing only him from that group of people that was just on stage and given him the chance to retort?

So standing out there now are Karina and the Situation, Rick and Cheryl, Michael and Chelsie, and Brandy and Maks. Who else is safe? Rick and Cheryl. So now we're down to three. Tom runs down how each couple did last night. Which we already did at the open of the show, and possibly a few more times since then. And then there's another break. Man, they were light on content this week. I wonder if someone dropped out or something. Couldn't Seal have done another song?

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