Episode Report Card Sara M: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Degra Dearest
By Sara M | Season 3 | Episode 20 | Aired on 04.27.2004
Okay, so, I've never watched this show before, on principle. I didn't think a prequel to the franchise was a very good idea, nor did I think they should start a series so soon after Voyager ended. So I'll admit I'm not too familiar with this series, even if I am pretty knowledgeable about the entire franchise, having seen every episode ofTOS, TNG, and Voyager, as well as every movie except for Generations, again on principle, that principle being that I thought it was stupid to have Kirk in the movie but not the rest of the bridge crew. What I'm trying to say is, I'm sure I'll make a couple mistakes here, so I apologize in advance. I also want to say that I'm really excited to do a recap of a show that is bound to be better than my regular one. So let the fun begin!
Previously on Enterprise: a whole bunch of ships kicked the Enterprise's ass. People died. Archer told some guy that if he destroyed Earth, he'd be eliminating his own species, then told T'Pol he may have gotten through to one of the Xindi. That Xindi talks to a whole bunch of other weird, bitchy aliens. T'Pol tells Phlox that she has a drug problem. Trip's sister died when Florida got rocked.
As the Enterprise soars through the heavens, Archer addresses his crew. He tells them that at least the ship is still in one piece. And sorry about the dead eighteen crewmen. Trip, T'Pol, and that English guy who looks like Martin Short look on. And apparently, in the future, it is no longer bad manners to not shower before a funeral or whatever this is supposed to be. Archer says they will accomplish their mission for the people of Earth and for the eighteen dead people.
And then…
Sara M's roommate, Kristophe: What is this?
Sara M: I think it's a commercial for allergy medication.
Kristophe: No…I think it's the theme song!
Sara M: Ew, what?
Kristophe: No, it is! Look, here come the credits.
Sara M: What the fucking fuck happened? This sucks!
Kristophe: I thought Star Trek shows always had a really awesome orchestral opening.
Sara M: Oh, gross, it actually gets worse as it proceeds!
Kristophe: What is he singing?
Sara M: "Faith…of the heart"? Oh, no!
Kristophe: Do you think it's too late to back out of subbing for this show?