Episode Report Card 0 USERS: N/A YOU GRADE IT Something Wicca This Way Goes
By Demian | Season 7 | Episode 22 | Aired on May 21, 2005
Previously on Hags, Nags, And Neglected Fags, Daddy Dearest dropped by the Manor to babysit Big Gay Chris; Pepper Anderson, The Best Policewoman In The History Of Forever, took one of Li'l Bulging Brody's tranquilizer darts to the neck, fell into a coma, and eventually returned with half of her memory gone; The Dazzling Sheila issued an ultimatum; Pepper Anderson and her mondo kachongas told the Doormat to have fun on vacation; and Zankou wanted the dread Woogy, but got the Book of Shadows instead.
Currently on Only Twenty-Two Left! Only Twenty-Two Left! Only Twen-- Oh, Fuck It, we pick up shortly after we left off as Raige orbs into a side chamber deep within Not!warts with Piper and Phoebe, the latter of whom frets, "How do we know Zankou's not here waiting for us?" "Because [Not!warts] is protected from him," Raige reminds her, as Piper spins on her heel and barrels into the hallway outside while bellowing for her dolt of a husband. Phoebe and Raige skitter along after her, and the three women pedebabble their way through a hasty round of Book-related exposition. Briefly, while Zankou now possesses the Book of Shadows, "he can't use all of its powers" without first finagling a way to swipe the Glamorous Ladies'. While such a thing has been done before, as long as they remain within Not!warts, they should be safe from any demonic machinations. The Dolt finally blunders onto the scene to wonder what's wrong. After Piper receives assurance that the kids are fine, Phoebe drops this evening's plot bomb on the Dolt's scarily gargantuan gargoyle head. "What?" panics the Dolt. "How?" "As soon as we figure it out, we'll let you know," Raige snots, like, I know how useless he is, honey, but damn. Moderate the tone a little bit, would you? "He broke us down," Phoebe sighs. "Because our powers are tied to the Book," she explains, "and our emotions are tied to our powers, by making us vulnerable..." "He made the Book vulnerable, too," the Dolt realizes. Very good, Dolt. Have a cookie. And then do us all a favor and tell us something we don't already know. "The question is," Phoebe announces, "what is he really after?" "What he's always after," Raige glums. "Power." "The Nexus!" Piper breathes. DUN! Sort of. Well, okay, not really a DUN! at all, seeing as how he's already gone after it once before, but whatever. I can't be assed to care anymore