Episode Report Card Cate: A+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Hot Pants
By Cate | Season 6 | Episode 14 | Aired on 02.10.2002
So what's Annie's big VD surprise for RevCam? Well, she's started hormone replacement therapy. RevCam makes the mistake of thinking that she did this for him. Hey, it's a little insensitive, but considering that Annie has been referring to this as a big Valentine's surprise all day, I think it's sort of understandable. In any case, he attempts a fairly decent save, but it's not good enough for Cruella, who twists up her face and glares at Eric mutinously. Finally, she pours a glass of wine over his head and gets up to leave. Hey, Annie, can I have the number for your physician? Obviously, this doctor is a miracle worker. Maybe her doctor should have picked up the January 22nd issue of Woman's World like I did. (Hey, quit looking at me like that! I don't regularly buy it. I just wanted to know how to germ-proof myself!) Anyway, according to studies at the University of Pittsburgh, drinking three to six beers a week boosts estrogen levels by as much as twenty per cent -- about the same as hormone therapy. I'd find that a little scary if I were a guy, but I think the 7th Heaven writers should make use of this. If you do the math, you'll realize that six beers per week works out to…that's right, about half a beer per day! Spooky, huh?
RevCam chases Annie into the house. He's about to follow her up the stairs when he's distracted by Simon and Maria, who are making out on the living room couch while the twins look on with interest. Eric doesn't break up the happy couple, even though it looks like they're mere seconds away from having sex. He just covers the twins' eyes and leads them out of the room. You can bet that if this were one of his over-eighteen daughters, he'd have put a stop to it.
Dopey shows up on Cheryl's doorstep, to a not-so-warm reception. It's obvious Cheryl has a date over -- presumably one who is willing to have sex with her. She's also decked out in red for Valentine's Day. Aw, that's so cute. Obviously feeling sorry for Matt, she deigns to talk to him for a few minutes as he pathetically asks her why they're not together anymore. She's smooth enough not to be drawn into a pointless discussion, especially when he asks her who the right girl is for him. What a bizarre thing to ask your ex-girlfriend! She gives him a pity kiss on the cheek and returns to her surely-much-more-exciting new boyfriend.
Back at the pool hall, Mary is ordering a soda at the bar when she sees her friend Cory walk down the stairs. Mary tells her how great it is to see her. Cory guiltily says, "When you find out who I'm here with, you might not be so happy to see me." Oh, whoever could it be? Try to think of the least original thing the writers could do here, and I'm sure you'll figure out the answer. Why, it's Wilson, of course! Mary says, "What the --" but has to stop herself, because this is a G-rated show. Wilson puts an arm around Cory and monotones, "Hi, Mary."