Episode Report Card Daniel: C | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Good…bad…Ana's the one with the gun
By Daniel | Season 2 | Episode 8 | Aired on 11.22.2005
This annoying and ridiculous scene is interrupted by Detective Raggs popping in to tell Ana that there's an important call for her in the bullpen. She says she'll be right there. He leaves. "They got you a cake. Try and act surprised," says Captain Foxy Mama. I don't think Mama's a killjoy for blowing Ana-Lucia's surprise. After all, Shannon knows what happens when you surprise Ana-Lucia; I think Captain Foxy just didn't want to lose any officers in a welcome-back-party massacre.
Back on Craphole Island, Jack's filling a water bottle from a trough on the beach. Everybody's island mother, Rose, strolls up and tells him how nice it is to see him out of the hatch and that he needs more sunshine. "I'll take that under advisement," says Jack, wryly. She adds that some fruit wouldn't hurt him either. Good for the constitution, they say. "Well, if that's what they say," says Jack. Just shut up and have some mango, Jack. Or guava or pomegranate or WHATEVER. He stuffs his face with some and says it's really good and asks where she got it, and she upbraids him for speaking with his mouth full.
Then there's a splash in the trough. Jack reaches in the water and pulls out a golf ball. He rolls his eyes. Someone's using his good Titleists!
Down the beach, Hurley, Charlie, and Kate are having a little target practice, apparently. "Past the hanging tree, double or nothing," says Hurley. Kate asks if he's sure, and Hurley says she'll never hit it that far. Charlie warns that she's on steroids. I suppose Charlie is morally opposed to steroids? How does that work? Kate reminds Hurley that this shot is for $10,000. Charlie jokes that Hurley's worth $156 million, so he's good for it and will probably even build her her own course. Kate laughingly asks what he's talking about, so Hurley says this, which is the wisest thing ever said on television: "Ignore him, he's an idiot." Kate swings, and it's not pretty. I mean, she's pretty, but her backswing is as ugly as Snoop's from that commercial he did with Lee Iacocca. "Crap!" says Hurley!
Jack strolls up. "You hooked it. Try keeping your left arm straight," he says. Didn't she hit it where she was aiming? Wasn't that why Hurley said, "Crap"? Did I miss something? Oh, wait, Jack's just being a know-it-all. Should have known. "You're giving me tips?" says Kate, all incredulous, like maybe I missed the episode where Kate's backstory is that she's Annika Sorenstam or something. Kate, he's a doctor. "Kate, I'm a doctor," he says. She asks if he thinks he could do better, and Jack laughs his silly-woman laugh. He says that anyone can hit a ball, but that's not golf. "Golf is accuracy," he says. It's a real pompous-athon tonight, isn't it? Kate suggests playing a few holes and seeing who's more accurate. And she's flirting with him. So I guess the Kate love train is back on the Jack track. Of course, the writers are only doing this because Sawyer's coming back to the camp this episode. Jack looks over at Charlie and Hurley and grins, and the two of them are over to the side hooting like Statler and Waldorf. Jack thinks she's kidding, but she ain't: "Three holes, no handicap, we play for bragging rights." And hey, what are they waiting for? They stroll off. Charlie looks like he's enjoying this, Hurley looks somewhat nonplussed that his game is over.