Episode Report Card Demian: C | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Y Tu Mammaries También
By Demian | Season 5 | Episode 10 | Aired on 01.04.2003
Manor parlor. Aftermath. Piper bleakly regards a framed photo of the Reconstituted Charmed Ones in happier times, and sniffles. The Dolt bounds down the stairs for a pep talk. Shut up, Dolt. Long story short, Piper stumbles across a cunning plan. Of course, she stumbles across it through her tears of despair and by "listening to her heart," or some such nonsense. Whatever.
(Hewitt)'s Crypt. (Hewitt) and Risis fret that Cole won't return in time to save her. Just then, Cole smears into the chamber with a po-faced Piper. "She's decided!" Cole announces with a triumphant -- and crazy! -- flourish. "Drum roll! Please!" Piper shuffles over to the tables containing her prone sisters and glumly admits that she's chosen to save Phoebe. "The suspense was killing me," snarks Cole. (Hewitt) shoves Risis's soul vanquish into Piper's mug, but she declines, claiming she's written a spell of her own. "[Raige]," Piper states evenly, taking Risis by the hand, "I know you can hear me, and I know you can understand, but I can't lose Phoebe." "Just do it," Risis grunts. Heh. Piper slides a sheet of notebook paper from the pocket of her jeans and lowers her head solemnly to recite the following:
Two warring souls now burn inside
Where only one can reside.
I call upon the Power of Three
To save her body and set [Raige] free.
Risis gasps, and a glowy essence slips from her body to dissipate in the air. (Hewitt) rushes to her side and, as he lifts her from the table, asks breathlessly, "Did it work?" "It did," she allows, caressing his shoulders. "And I know just how to celebrate." Raige knees (Hewitt) in the groin. I guess he's not the emasculated god of myth after all, for he doubles over in agony and crumples to the floor. "Oooh," Cole winces sympathetically before Piper sends him flying into the far wall with her Hands Of Discontent. Raige crosses to the appealingly silent Feebs and intones, "Dromos wabet khufu nemes akh." The marauding horde of hungry CGI bandages slinks away from Phoebe's body, defeated, and Phoebe shudders back to life. Make a note of this episode: Henceforth, Raige can resurrect the dead. The Dolt is now utterly useless, right? Raige glances at (Hewitt) and shrugs, "You really can't mess with sisters." Piper sneers, flinging her Hands in his direction, and (Hewitt) disappears in a cloud of chunky dirt. Cole picks himself up from the ground and loudly applauds Piper's victory. Piper helpfully reveals that she knew all along Raige would have plumbed the depths of Isis's soul to retrieve the resurrection spell, or something, so the Glamorous Ladies never were in any real danger. I think. Cole mildly -- but crazily! -- shrugs his shoulders and perks, "Next time!" "Next time?" Phoebe asks. Dammit! It speaks! "What happened to you, Cole?" "I've gone mad," he simply -- yet crazily! -- replies. Phoebe's eye-roll is audible. Cole smears off to points unknown as Piper asserts, "We really need to find a way to kill him." "I wish it was that easy," mopes the Feebs.