Episode Report Card Sars: C | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT R U Experienced?
By Sars | Season 4 | Episode 13 | Aired on 01.30.2001
McPhee Manor. "Here He Comes Now, Say, Tobey" Tobey stands on the lawn, staring at the front door and looking apprehensive. The camera pans around to show Jack "Big Top Pee-Wee" McPhee returning from his morning run. Tobey snides about how he should have known that Jack's "the type that jogs." "What type is that, exactly?" Jack pants, pulling off his headphones. Tobey continues to crack on Jack as "the country-club-family type," albeit in a nicer tone of voice than usual. I really had high hopes for Tobey after the last episode, but he doesn't appear to have learned anything; plus, his hair looks like it got blown onto his head from behind somehow. It's really weird, and quite bad. Jack, also not winning any awards in the hair department (his 'do has that weird plasticky Hair-Club-For-Men-weave thing going on), gruffs, "Tobey, what're you doing here?" "I've come to proposition you," Tobey Freudian-slips, then hastily assures Jack that it's "merely a turn of phrase" before pitching him on the idea of joining an after-school tutoring program, because "[he] can read." Jack snorts that that makes him feel special. Tobey tells Jack to "check [his] attitude at the door and let's get serious for a minute." Then Tony Robbins bounds onto the set and urges Jack to walk barefoot over a bed of hot coals. Oh, wait, actually Tobey reminds Jack that he likes working with kids, and these kids need his help. Jack says he's not interested in a repeat of the soccer thing. Tobey says that everyone at "the Council" knows that he's gay: "It's not an issue." Jack is still lukewarm on the idea; Tobey tells him to come by if he changes his mind. Jack heads into the house; cut to a lovestruck Tobey watching him go, and the sound of the door slamming. Now that's what I call foreshadowing!
At the docks, Pacey crabs about having to go on the date with Drue and refers to NLNC as "Satan's handmaiden." Joey hits him with the puppy-dog eyes and says, "You want me on our senior trip, don't you?" Pacey smarms that he "wants" her everywhere -- ski resort, parking lot, "[he's] not choosy." Joey ignores that and reminds him that it's their priority to make sure that Anna has a good time. Banter. Schmoop. The Annamobile pulls up, and Anna gets out, wondering aloud why people always honk at her. Drue snarls that it's probably because she "camped out" in the middle of an intersection to check her make-up. Anna snarks at Drue, who snarks back at her and then snarks at Joey and blah, who snarks back at him and blah, and introductions and blah, and Pacey pretends he's Joey and blah, confusion reigns, Drue wants to "get this disaster on the road," Pacey opens Anna's car door for her and Joey gives him a look, and he shrugs, "Just bein' nice," and Joey's all, "Mmm hmm."