Episode Report Card Jeff Long: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Season 3 Finale, Part I
By Jeff Long | Season 3 | Episode 13 | Aired on 10.10.2006
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.It's the first half of the finale this week. The designers go to their respective corners and get to work. They all get a visit from Tim Gunn, who arrives at each of their homes driving a kicky Saturn. First, he visits Michael, who is a charming host. His designs, however, are looking pretty crapola. They have dinner at Michael's family's home, where Michael's father expresses relief that his son is not a "beautician." Next, Tim goes to Uli's Miami condo. Uli tells us about growing up in East Germany and how America is the land of dreams and it's absolutely endearing. Her designs are looking very "Uli," which is debatable qualitatively. At Jeffrey's, we hear more about Jeffrey's monster of a father and his troubled druggy youth. His kid is really cute and his girlfriend looks like she could kick some serious ass. As well, Jeffrey lives in a really kick-ass home and has a HUGE workspace. He could make Mardi Gras floats in that workspace. His collection is coming along beautifully, and Tim is duly impressed. At Laura's place in Manhattan, we meet her little boys, who all seem really cute. One of them offers Tim Gunn some turtle feces, which Tim responds to with Sturm und Drang. Laura's stuff is what you might expect, and Tim gives her praise as well as some criticism.
Then the designers are back in New York, sharing a suite. Since the airing of the show, it's apparent that Laura really doesn't like Jeffrey, not that there was much love to lose there in the first place. They all start getting to work, all except for Jeffrey. He is totally, 100 percent finished, which arouses suspicion from Laura. Uli and Michael agree, only they're quieter about it. Finally, Laura tells Tim her problem with Jeffrey's stuff â essentially, he was a crappy sewer during the competitions and now his work is flawlessly completed. She thinks he had help sewing that was against the rules. Then she tells Jeffrey that she broached the subject with Tim. He gets really antsy and anxious, especially after Tim tells him that they will be investigating his process. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Four designers are going to Fashion Week! All of the designers are sitting by the runway at Parsons for some reason. There's a shot of Uli and Michael sitting beside each other. Heidi enters the runway carrying the lovely black velvet button bag. She reminds us that all four of the designers are going to Olympus Fashion Week. Then she asks them if they are excited. Oddly, they couldn't care less. I'm lying. They are going to have to create twelve looks to complete their collections. They will be using the models they had from the last challenge, which means that Laura has Camilla, Jeffrey has Marilinda, Uli has Nazri, and Michael has busted Clarissa. Heidi reviews the list of rewards that the winner will receive, and it looks like the Saturn Sky Roadster gets the biggest response. Unless, of course, we see them reacting to something different altogether, which could very well be the case. Likewise, maybe this whole universe is just an atom that's a part of a molecule that's a part of, I don't know, a dog or something; and we're all just living in this tiny atom and right next to us there's a whole other universe. But it's all so insignificant, because we're really just part of some dog. Makes you a little crazy to think about, eh? That's how I feel when I start thinking about the editing too much. It's like I'm just a tiny part of a dog and that's not great for my self-image. So, they're thrilled about the Saturn Sky Roadster.
Then Heidi introduces a "very special guest." It's Tim Gunn. I understand that the pomp and circumstance is a refined sort of presentation or whatever, but... sweet Jesus. I'm seriously so over the champagne toasts and very special guests. They're asking a lot of the acting talents of these fashion designers, to diminishing returns. With each champagne toast and very special guest, the "Woo!"s and "Oh my God!"s have gotten a little less rowdy, a little more ironic.
Tim tells the designers that Fashion Week is a big deal, so they need to do work up to the quality he and the judges know that they can offer. Heidi adds that they shouldn't be safe. "Amaze us." Why am I so irritated by this whole runway moment? Anyway, she tells them to pack their bags. She will see them again in two months. Then she and Tim walk backstage arm in arm. She brought the lovely black velvet button bag out there and never used it.
We see Laura and Uli packing, and Laura announces that she is not only a great sewer, but also a great packer. It's probably more rewarding to pack when you're using vintage Louis Vuitton cases. My Samsonite duffel doesn't really provide the same charge. She interviews that showing at Bryant Park is a huge career opportunity for her. She is not daunted by the task before her because, as she says, "I produced a whole line of kids. Why can't I produce a whole line of dresses?" And I hear far fewer episiotomies are performed during the production of dresses than the production of babies. Except for Michael Kors. Don't ask.
"Atlas, you've been good to us," Michael says to the building as he and Jeffrey are leaving the apartment. As they all carry their luggage outside of the building, Laura announces that she's walking home, and off she goes. Michael, Jeffrey, and Uli laugh as she does a little knock-kneed jig for their benefit.