Episode Report Card Sobell: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Michael and Lincoln -- not dead!
By Sobell | Season 2 | Episode 3 | Aired on 09.03.2006
Sadly, we only get the opening ceremonies, and by the time the next scene rolls around, the guys have kissed and made up. In a totally manly way, of course. Bellick says ruefully, "To be totally honest, Roy, I could have done without the knee to the junk." Roy defends himself: "You bit me, Brad! Like a little girl, you bit me." I think we all just got a totally unsolicited peek into Roy's love life. Anyway, Bellick concludes, "What's crazy is us taking it out on each other for how things turned out. You want someone to blame, how about those convicts?" Yeah, how about those convicts? The ones that took advantage of your bribery-susceptible, personal-belongings-stealing, totally phoning-it-in ways -- why, they're the ones who deserve all the blame! Bellick grumps, "They took my job, my pension, my dignity." Well, two out of three, anyway. Anyway, Roy decides that hanging out with an aggrieved drunk is no fun, so he pokes Bellick into becoming a mean drunk by suggesting that maybe the two of them could hit the road as some bounty-hunting team. Bizarrely, I am looking forward to seeing how this works out. It's like the beginning of a new franchise: Hateful Old(er) Men.
Meanwhile, Michael is scoping out the towing lot where his car went. He is then forced to walk in to the office and interact with a live, non-felonious human. Going by Michael's halting inquiry into how to get his car back, this could be the most challenging thing he's undertaken yet. Chuck the car jockey asks what Michael's car looked like.
We then get an echo of the inquiry with Mahone asking, "What did it look like? The car you stole the backpack from." The vagrant says, "I dunno know, man, maybe it was...gray." We quickly cut to Michael saying it was a gray Accord. Wow, do you think the people who make this show are trying to demonstrate how Michael and Mahone are really Mind Mates? The vagrant huffily tells a roomful of be-suited FBI dudes that he wasn't really so interested in the car as he was the backpack, which he had hoped had clothing in it. Mahone asks where the car was parked and -- boom! We're back to Chuck, asking Michael the same question. And now everyone knows the car was parked on Hancock and 15th street. The vagrant adds that the car's not there now, since it was towed for...not paying the meter? (Dude, that is hard core. In my town, all they do is ticket you.) Chuck tells Michael that he'll owe $60 for the tow and another $24 for an overnight stay. Which sort of raises a whole lot of new questions like: did it take 24 hours for Michael and Linc to get to Nika's? Does that mean they are still within that first-72-hours thing, or did that 24 hours knock them out of the time frame? Exactly how far away is Nika's place from Oswego? And how did they get there? I should just not worry my pretty little head about these things.