Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT I.C.U.
By Jacob Clifton | Season 1 | Episode 11 | Aired on 01.03.2011
Emily's parents have a sort of unbearable meeting on the couch about how Emily is hiding something and needs her dad, and how she's friends with Toby Cavanaugh and how Alison was murdered and everything but the fact that Emily is a lesbian, which Emily's mom thinks her dad will be as if not more ambivalent about than she is. And she has to clean the house, and everything is broken, and he's got to leave for Texas at some unknown point for training exercises. Emily's dad's final point is that if you want to know something you should man up and ask the person, and trust your daughter to tell the truth, but that is not how her mom rolls, so she gets off the couch and starts cleaning the house. It's all just a little too realistic.
Things are scary in the hospital room -- staring Noel teddybear with bright green eyes, doorhandle slowly turning -- but then Mona comes in, waving a white La Perla brassiere and being generally Monaesque. She points to the cast and goes, "That's, like, for a broken leg!" Heh. Hanna is kind to her as usual, admitting that she'll be out of heels for a little while, and letting her sit on the bed. They discuss how Mona feels super guilty for uninviting her to Camp Mona, resulting in her "desperate" sneaking "around the edges," which led to the accident. Since she can't explain about A and Noel and everything, Hanna just assures her she's got nothing to feel bad about, and then Mona gives her a makeover, because Mona is actually that uncomplicated. And actually pretty awesome:
"Do you remember that time you threw up on the trampoline? You did that backflip, and you barfed as you went over... Well, the thing I remember was your dismount. You knew everybody was staring at you. You got to the edge, climbed down, and looked at us. You wiped your mouth, and then you took a bow. I was in awe." Of me hurling on the trampoline? "No, of that bow. I mean, it was like this incredible life lesson. That's when I knew I wanted to be your friend."
It's funny because Mona is maybe even a little more awesome in the books, but Hanna is so fucking gross you wouldn't believe it. I kind of love her best, on the show, but I had to stop reading the books because I hated Hanna so much. She's like this bulimic Marissa Cooper, crossed with Elizabeth Wurtzel and Julie Powell and Anastasia and Drizella Tremaine. Horrible person. Not even funny-awful, just nasty. She even made Aria seem like less of a douchebag. Reading her chapters was like putting on an oily pair of pants.