Episode Report Card Wing Chun: D | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Crime And Punishment
By Wing Chun | Season 3 | Episode 15 | Aired on 02.08.2000
In the library, Andie "Little Punisher" McPhee presides over a disciplinary hearing; the defendant is last week's party-thrower Matt Caufield, and I'd just like to say that if they wanted to resurrect the character of Chris "Teen" Wolfe, they should have just waited for Jason Behr to have a day off from Roswell and bring him back, because it's not like the viewer doesn't notice that the two characters are identical. ["Well, except for the fact that Caufield is old enough to be Teen Wolfe's father." -- Sars] Anyway, Matt protests that he used his cell phone to call his mom and ask her the answer to a question on a quiz he was taking as "a joke" at which even his teacher laughed. Andie primly informs him that there's nothing funny about cheating and sentences him to a failing grade on the quiz and a three-hour detention, which actually sounds pretty fair to me. Matt sarcastically suggests that she "bust [his] kneecaps while [she's] at it," and Principatundé tells him to shut up, and opines that while Matt's behaviour violated the letter of the honour code, it doesn't violate the spirit of same, and that Matt is free to go, but that this better be the last time Matt shows up before the disciplinary committee. A bunch of guys, presumably Matt's henchmen, get up and leave with him. They're allowed to spectate a disciplinary hearing? Whatever. Andie looks distressed that her ruling was overturned.
Sometime later, Andie is getting her books together when Principatundé, talking to another guy, calls to her to wait. When he comes over, she starts apologizing about her behaviour in sentencing Matt, and he stops her and says that's not why he wanted to talk to her. Rather, he wanted to tell her that this morning the Educational Testing Service called to tell him that Andie's "phenomenal" PSAT scores place her among the top 50,000 scorers in the country. Am I the only one who doesn't think that's so impressive? Among the top 100 in the country -- that would be something. Anyway, he goes on to tell her that she's taken one step closer to a National Merit Scholarship, and isn't that fantastic? She haltingly repeats, "Fantastic," and he asks her what's wrong. She mumbles something, and finally admits she's stunned. He warmly congratulates her, and then leaves her to stew in her own guilty juices.
A buzzer sounds as Pacey, carrying a duffel bag and a tinfoil-covered casserole dish, walks into the quite lovely red-painted foyer of a tony apartment building and up to the French doors of the abode of...Deputy Doug, who opens the door and immediately tries to close it again (though Pacey sticks his foot in too quickly), yelling, "No! No! No! Look, Pacey, last time you were here, you left water rings on my Deco coffee table." Pacey winningly tells Deputy Doug that their parents just wanted Pacey to bring Deputy Doug something; he proffers the casserole, and then, pushing his way past Deputy Doug, says, "Me!" It seems that Pacey's parents -- who, as we already know, suck -- have sent Pacey to live with Deputy Doug as long as Pacey's sister is at the house. Deputy Doug grouses, "This is not Party of Five," which is both true and a shame because if Dawson's Creek were Party of Five, it would be ENDING SOON. Anyway, Deputy Doug argues some more, but eventually relents on the condition that they not eat anything their mother sends over, that Pacey always use coasters, and that Pacey keep the CD collection in alphabetical order. Pacey remarks that he doesn't foresee partaking of Deputy Doug's "diva collection," and Deputy Doug notes that the stylings of an "impassioned female voice" could do wonders for Pacey's wounded heart. Pacey tells Deputy Doug that if he's referring to their recent jailhouse conversation, Deputy Doug should chalk up anything Pacey said to "drunken ramblings." This reminds Deputy Doug to add that there will be neither drinking nor teenaged moping while Pacey is rooming with him, and to ask, "Are you any good at découpage?" Pacey stares at the table and mutters, "Oh, God help me." I, for one, am looking forward to seeing more of these two together. They make a very effective comic team.