Episode Report Card Megyn: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Do you like gladiator movies?
By Megyn | Season 4 | Episode 12 | Aired on 01.27.2001
In the infirmary, Gloria gets ready to examine all the pill-poppers, who are currently in their underwear. Cyril stands and plays with a split end while she checks Ryan out…and then she examines him. Thank you, I'll be here all week. Ryan asks when the effects of the drug will start rearing their little gray heads. Gloria says it's never been tested on humans, or Robson, but the lab rats began aging within three days. Ryan leans closer and winces, "If I get old and wrinkled, will you still love me?" Gloria looks at him, thinking, "Hell no" but just stares dumbly at him until, "Next!" Cyril plops down and she asks if he has any complaints. "I have a tummy-ache." Yeah, you and me both, Cyril.
Lights on! Ryan sits up in his cot and hacks a few times before telling Cyril to get up. He hops down from said cot and walks over to the mirror to splash. He catches sight of poor old Cyril and "Mother of Christ!" Cyril turns over and says, "Ryan, I don't feel so good." Back in the infirmary, Cyril gets examined yet again by Dr. Nathan's amazing stethoscope of diagnosis. She finishes, and Ryan follows her to her desk. He asks what she found. "He's begun to age." Does anyone have a cookie? Because that Gloria sure deserves one for that astute observation brought to you by the makers of No Shit Sherlock. Ryan wigs, "What about me?" The whole idea was for him and Cyril to go through this together, "to get out of Oz, together." He wants her to stop administering the drug to Cyril. She says no: "You signed an agreement." "I don't care! Everything I've done so far has fucked Cyril's life up and I'm not about to watch him disintegrate!" Gloria sticks to her guns and refuses to stop with the pills. Again with the "You signed an agreement!" Ryan: "I don't care!" Gloria: "Well, I do!" Ryan glares and points at her: "Fuck you." He goes to take Cyril back to their pod; she protests and says they're keeping him for observation, then tells the guards to get Ryan out of there. Maybe I'm just nutty, but I detect trouble in paradise. Speaking of nutty…wonder how Alvarez is doing.
Beecher and Ryan on a landing above the common area. "You seen my brother's hair?" Beecher confirms that he has, and Ryan begins the discussion of everyone backing out and how he wants to stop the drug testing. Beecher calls him on his shit by saying, "That's just like you, O'Reily." Beecher lectures him that, although he's "terrified" of what the effects of the drug will be, he's not backing out…he gave his word. Ryan says he'll talk to the others, and Beecher smirks, "Those guys are used to playing Russian roulette with their lives."