Episode Report Card Cate: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Still Dopey after all these years
By Cate | Season 5 | Episode 17 | Aired on 04.15.2001
Gross -- it's Mike Pierce again. He knows how to fit right into the nosy CamClan, telling Lucy that he's come by to see how Matt's evaluation went. He's interrupted by Simon, who wants to discuss the Sasha situation in a loud voice, even though Sasha is just down the hall in the kitchen. Simon and Mike band together and bust on Lucy for a while, denigrating her advice to Simon to lie about the CamRents forbidding him to date Sasha. I would have rolled my eyes and left the room, but Lucy defends herself, challenging the junior Promise Keepers to demonstrate how they would have handled the situation. Simon's response is a cloddish, "I don't want to go out with you anymore. Sorry." Mike turns on the smarm, but he can't come up with anything better. When Lucy laughs at him, he goes on the defensive, telling her, "I didn't have any problems breaking up with you, did I?" Ouch. Lucy points out that Mike has been hanging around more since Jeremy left town.
Fortunately, this pointless and annoying argument is interrupted by Sasha, who wants to speak to Simon. She says that Annie made her realize that she was only dating Simon because he wouldn't pressure her for sex. Annie also convinced her to date guys her own age, but not have sex with them. Chalk one up for the Camden abstinence campaign. But if Sasha wants to date guys closer to her own age who don't want to have sex, maybe she should consider Dopey. Their utter stupidity would give them something in common right off the bat, even though Sasha is trying to pretend that she's not shallow. She closes her woodenly delivered speech by telling Simon that he's nice but she doesn't want to go out with him anymore. With a chaste little kiss on his cheek, she's out of there. Simon is pretty dumb -- I mean, "dumbfounded."
Lucy and Mike walk back into the living room, and Simon asks if they heard what just transpired. Duh, of course they did. Lucy's a Camden, isn't she? Simon leaves, and Mike comments that he "told [Sasha] the truth." Lucy asks Mike to tell her the truth about him and Elaina. Remember her? She was the girl with whom Mike wanted to have dozens of children. Now we find out he ditched her because she accepted dates from other guys and Mike wants a relationship. Without prompting, Lucy tells him that she doesn't want a relationship right now because she's on the rebound from Jeremy. Jeez, wasn't he only on for, like, one episode? Mike says something about how he still has "feelings" for Lucy, although he knows she doesn't feel that way about him. I just can't keep track of all this. A few episodes ago, she did have feelings for Mike and he wanted to date Elaina. Now...ah, fuck it. I'll bet the writers can't even keep it straight, so why should anybody else bother.