Episode Report Card Wing Chun: D | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Decisions
By Wing Chun | Season 1 | Episode 13 | Aired on 05.18.1998
Pacey "Fail, Caesar!" Witter is riding his bike along the sidewalk when he hears the siren of a police car. Pacey turns to see the source, and then rides his bike into the road and drops it directly in front of Deputy Doug's car, demanding to know what Doug wants and bitching that he's on his way to work. Deputy Doug says that their dad is looking for him, and that he's mad. Pacey asks what he did now, and Deputy Doug says it's what he didn't do, "like, pass any of [his] midterms," and that Sheriff Witter's worried. Pacey sarcastically says, "Well, you can tell him that his concern is appreciated, but he should save it for the closet case with the gun." Deputy Doug gets out of the cruiser to bust Pacey's balls about being a screw-up, and Pacey drawls, "You know what, Dougie, why don't you run along and go grab a cat out of a tree or something? And tell Dad that if he wants to talk to me, he should do it himself." Deputy Doug warns him, "You know, one day, Pacey, you're going to be tired of being a joke, and it's going to be too late. You're going to wake up and realize that you're just a bad punchline that nobody's laughing at. Now, you have a good day, little brother." Wait a second. Hold up. Pacey has problems with his family? They could have mentioned that. And, wait, is Joey's mom dead, or something? Because I'm not sure.
At the bus station, Joey thanks Dawson for coming with her to see her dad. He asks when she last saw Mr. Pothead, and she says, "Two years ago. About the same time I discovered he was trafficking marijuana while cheating on my dying mother with a bleached-blonde cocktail waitress." Dawson's tremendous words of support upon hearing this rather disturbing description of the man she's about to see: "Well, it's only for today." Clap. Clap. Bra. Vo. Dawson then "casually" asks whether she's made any decision about going to Europe. Joey shrugs, and says she's "still weighing it for fantasy elements," whatever that means. He tells her it's "an incredible opportunity," like, thanks, I don't think she knew that, and she asks him what he'd do if she went. Dawson replies, "Suicide." Oh my God -- JOEY, now you DEFINITELY have to go! Dawson jokes some more about his method of suicide (and, sorry, readers, he wants it to be by a means that's "painless," worse luck). Joey seriously repeats the question, and the strings squeal with trepidation on the soundtrack as Dawson replies, "If Paris made you happy, then I'd be happy for you." Joey smiles wanly.