Episode Report Card Cindy McLennan: A | 845 USERS: B+ YOU GRADE IT Right Round Like A Record Baby
By Cindy McLennan | Season 5 | Episode 2 | Aired on 2009.01.21
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.On the island, all the strand-aways are together at the beach. There's a survivor named Neil, whom Sawyer refers to as Frogurt. Frogurt is as annoying as all get out and not just because he left a stray shirt lying around that Sawyer used to cover his previously shirtless self (what'd he have to do that for?). When Daniel catches up to everyone, he says he has to calculate new bearings before they can think about leaving the island and avoiding the next big flash. Charlotte confesses to some memory loss, which scares Daniel. Frogurt flips out on Bernard because Bernard isn't having any luck lighting a fire, and then someone shoots Frogurt with a flaming arrow and he's dead (or, as dead as anyone gets on this crazy island). Hooray! The flaming arrow attack heats up (sorry) which sends the rest of the strand-aways running for cover in the jungle, and Sawyer shouts plans to meet at the creek.
On the mainland, Hurley takes an unconscious Sayid to his house and enlists his father's help in hiding out. When the cops come looking for Hurley, Cheech lies to save his son, which is the least he could do for him, don't you think?
Aaron's just starting to whine to Kate that he wants to go home, when she gets a mysterious phone call from someone she's very surprised to hear from. The someone is in L.A. and they make plans to meet up. The someone is one Sun! She's all lovely at first, but then Kate tells her about the lawyers seeking the blood samples from her and Aaron. She's afraid because someone knows they're lying. Sun tells her not to worry; if they wanted to expose the lie, they would have already. She tells Kate she needs to "take care of them" -- to do anything she has to. Kate asks what kind of person Sun thinks she is. Oh Kate, don't front. Sun recounts how Kate was supposed to get Jin off the freighter, but then didn't. She then plays nice, saying if Kate hadn't done so, they probably all would have died, "instead of just [her] husband," but there's bite behind her words. Kate cries and apologizes. Sun takes her hand and says she doesn't blame her, then smarms, "So, how's Jack?"
Ben gives instructions to Jack to go home and pack anything he might ever want, because once they get to the island, they can never come back again. He'll pick Jack up in six hours. He just has to get Locke's corpse somewhere safe. That somewhere safe turns out to be a butcher shop. Ha. Jill is there and she'll watch the corpse.
Cheech gets Sayid to Jack, who immediately calls Ben and tells him about it. Before Cheech gets home, Hurley comes clean to his mother about their big lie and the crazy, crazy true story, and because she's his mother, she knows he's telling the truth. Meanwhile, Jack sneaks Sayid into the hospital, hooks him up to various monitors, and gives him a shot of something (adrenaline maybe, but in the arm). Sayid comes to, and nearly kills Jack before he realizes it's Jack, who explains that Hurley's father brought him to Jack. Sayid is very concerned whether anyone else knows Hurley's at home.
While Hurley cooks a Hot Pocket, Ben comes in. He almost talks Hurley into going back, but then Hurley remembers that Sayid told him to do the opposite of whatever Ben told him to do, so he runs out and surrenders to the police.
As Sawyer and Juliet are making their way to the creek, he steps on something. The shot is too dark for me to make it out -- it's some sort of nail or dart, though. They hear footsteps and take cover from the armed men walking through the jungle. They flank Sawyer and Juliet, grab her up by her ponytail, and say they're going to cut off both Juliet's hands if they don't tell them everything, and only one if they do. Sawyer tries to talk sense into them (I know!) but they're not willing. Locke saves the day, and kills/wounds/disables the assailants.
At what might be an Oxford office or lab, a cloaked woman fiddles with all sorts of equations and machinery. It looks like she's trying to find the island. She leaves her work space and goes to a chapel. Ben is there waiting, lighting candles. The roof doesn't fall in on his head. (I know!) The woman indicates she's had success, but that Ben only has 70 hours. He says he needs more. She tells him his needs are irrelevant. Seventy hours is what he's got. She turns, and we see it's Mrs. Hawking. Ben tells her he lost Hurley, and wants to know what happens if he can't get them all to come back. Mrs. Hawking says, "Then God help us all," and we fade to black. Dun!
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Welcome to the second hour of the season 5 premiere of Lost. That first hour flew by, didn't it? I hope this recap follows suit. Here we go. We begin shortly after Penny has rescued her darling dashing Desmond, the Oceanic Six, and Frank -- the chopper pilot. Per the title card, it's "Three Years Ago." I see you counting on your fingers. Don't bother. I mean even what I've been referring to (and will continue to refer to) as the current day or present is actually 2007. I think. Yeah. Right. My point is -- have some more popcorn, and use your fingers for a salt lick, like God intended. Aboard Searcher, Des brings two beers up from below deck, while Jack explains to everyone that they need to lie -- to claim they are the only survivors of Oceanic 815, so that they can protect the strand-aways from the wrath of Charles "I Can't Get No Respect" Widmore. Most of the gang is in shock, so unlike us, they don't realize how this almost makes sense -- but not quite. Or do they? Frank's cool with whatever they decide, or maybe he's hammered. Hurley, bless his heart, is totally against lying. He's really this show's moral center -- isn't he? Not that there are a lot of other candidates. He wonders if Penny can't appeal to her father. That's a big No! So, he suggests that if the whole gang tells the same story, it will be credible, regardless of how crazy it is, and then they can...I don't know, get help for the strand-aways... or themselves... I guess. That part's (even) less clear (maybe). He looks to Sayid for support, but doesn't even get a stretch-camisole's worth. Sautéing the words he'll someday eat, Hurley tells Sayid, "You know what, dude? I'm gonna remember this, and someday you're gonna need my help and I'm telling you right now, you're not getting it." Might I suggest a hearty Pinot Noir to wash that down?
Mainland; current day: Hurley drives so erratically, you wonder if he's drunk. I know you're trying to wake Sayid, but eyes on the road, dude! Behind him, a cruiser turns on its siren and lights. Hurley pulls over. The cop approaches as Hurley chants to himself to stay calm, and maybe he could if it weren't Ana-fricking-Lucia behind the badge. She asks, "What if I were real," and then berates him for driving like a maniac, and for pulling over -- since the cops already have pictures of him covered in blood, with a gun in his hand. Hurley's protest that it's just catsup falls on deaf, dead, imaginary ears. Well except since there's a lot of time travel going on, not to mention all the extreme undeadness of once-and-maybe-future-dead-people, so she may not be so imaginary after all. Is-it-live-or-Memorex Ana-Lucia tells Hurley he's got to pull together and encourages him to start with the basics. "First off, you need new clothes. Then you need to go to a safe place, and take Sayid to somebody you trust. You getting all this?" When Hurley says he is, she tells him to get to it and cautions him to stay away from the cops. Hurley thanks her, and she starts back to her not-real cruiser (unless it is) but can't leave well enough alone. "Oh, yeah. Libby says 'hi'," she says, thereby undermining much of the confidence she'd just instilled. When Ana-Lucia and her cruiser disappear into the ether, Hurley turns to a still-comatose Sayid and says, "Well, you heard her." because that's... healthy? Who cares? Poor Hurley. Get a move on and do what Ana-Lucia said, even though her teeth now look like she made a deal with the Devil.