Episode Report Card Couch Baron: B- | 9 USERS: C YOU GRADE IT The Prat Pack
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 6 | Aired on 04.06.1997
Cut to a geeky-looking guy taking notes. He looks like a cross between Screech from Saved By The Bell and Kevin McDonald from The Kids In The Hall. The Prat Pack harass the kid, whose name is Lance. And by "harass," I mean that they say things to him that might intimidate an eight-year-old. Blake grabs his notebook, and hijinks ensue until Principal Flutie comes up and demands to know what's going on. Feyon takes about a minute to come up with the witty rejoinder, "Nothing." Flutie: "Did I ask you to speak?" Hee. "Okay, I guess I did, but I want the truth. Lance?" Lance predictably tells him nothing, and Flutie leaves. The Prat Pack are all about Lance now, and invite him to check out the hyena house. Lance says that it's off-limits. Feyon: "And therein, my friend, lies the fun." Okay, do I need to point out that no bully in the world (except possibly a TWoP employee) would use the word "therein"? Shut up, Feyon.
They head into the hyena house, the entrance to which is decorated with yellow "Caution" tape. Buffy, Willow, and Xander observe the group, and think that Lance might be in trouble. Buffy says she'll check it out, but Xander wants to prove his manliness and goes in instead. What chutzpah. Willow and Buffy decide they should back him up, but are stopped by a man I'll dub Zookeeper Exposition, who's definitely getting a "Hey, It's That Guy!" from me. Time to visit the IMDb again...I'm back. His name's James Stephens, and he's had a bunch of movie and TV guest-star appearances. Nothing exciting. Oh, well. Z.E. says that hyenas are quick to prey on the weak. Wow, thanks! It's not like I learned about predators when I was six or anything. He goes on that the house is quarantined, because the hyenas just arrived from Africa. Uh, shouldn't they have been cleared before they got to the zoo? The zookeeper must be lying! Why no, I've never watched this episode before. Or TV at all. More blather about hyenas understanding and mimicking human speech in order to lure humans to a grisly death by eating. Yawn. Would you like to tell us anything else that's going to unfold on the screen in the next forty minutes?
Lance and the Prat Pack enter the hyena house and look around. Lance: "I don't see any hyenas." A hyena pops its head up. Oh, you wacky, unpredictable Joss, you! And what's this I hear about cowboys in space? Lance wants to leave, but the Prat Pack grab him and pull him up to the railing. Wouldn't the hyenas be completely caged? Sigh. Lance is freaked, but Xander comes to the rescue and pulls him away. Lance moves to a safe distance away. Feyon and Xander posture a bit, but the hyena growls, and the five of them turn to look. The hyena's eyes glow green, as do those of Blake and Balk Lite. The hyena's eyes glow again, and now so do Feyon's and Miss Cleo's. An aerial shot shows us that the kids are standing on a large painted symbol that looks vaguely like a crocodile's open mouth. Lance turns to run, but trips and falls. Xander keeps his back to us for dramatic effect, but the other four turn to look at him. Blake has an expression on his face like he's just taken a shower at the Oswald Correctional Facility, but the others start cackling like, well, hyenas. Lance runs out. Xander turns, and as he does, his eyes glow green as well. Ruh roh! Credits.