Episode Report Card Sobell: C+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Aldo Burrows -- dead!
By Sobell | Season 2 | Episode 12 | Aired on 11.19.2006
And then I spend the entire commercial break wondering exactly how many of Michael's tattoos have just been rendered irrelevant now that he's trashed his entire escape plan. On the bright side, at least he still has his legs, in case he feels like encoding his next elaborate plan somewhere.
Sucre's plane is still taking off when we get back from the commercial break. Linc is all, "Okay, Master Planner. What now?" Michael's genius plan: "We go back to the car, drive to a border town, find a cell phone signal, call a local tattoo artist, tattoo a new plan on me. After I've recovered from that massive ordeal, we can get started." Oh, not really. He's planning on calling Dr. Sara. This is like a two-for-one deal for him: any awkwardness he might feel, he can totally ignore because now he's back to needing Dr. Sara for how she can help his brother.
The plane is still ascending, and Mahone happens to see it as he's tooling down the road. He is so stunned by the sight, he has to whip off his glasses and goggle incredulously with his naked eyes. Mahone screams at nobody in particular, "Where the hell are those jets?" Having a dance-off brawl with the Sharks? ... What, wrong Jets?
Lincoln and Michael are driving along the road when a low, sonic rumble starts up. Michael asks Lincoln, "Do you hear that?" Of course he does -- the man's got eardrums sensitive enough to pick up a spent bullet casing two rooms away. Linc pulls over just in time for those two to see a jet go screaming across the sky and right toward Sucre's plane. Michael's all, "They're going to take him down. How'd they find out?" Via that guy y'all shot and left alive? Remember him? Then Mahone's car purrs as it pulls into view, and Lincoln's like, "Less gaping, more driving."
Back in the Tribune police station, Bellick's pacing around impatiently. When Slattery comes back in, he says belligerently, "I want to know what the hell's going on. If you were going to arrest me, you would have already done it. I'm out of here." Slattery tells him that's not really an option. Bellick points out that the receipt is hardly the smoking gun in this case, and Slattery's like, "True. So let me play you that voicemail wherein you vow to gut Roy like a trout." And with this scene, everyone in America learns a valuable lesson: always use a voice alteration program, and don't leave your name, when you call in death threats to those who double-cross you.
Bellick protests that he didn't kill Roy Geary, and that T-Bag set him up. As he shouts, "Bagwell set me up!" a few cops wrestle him and clap him in cuffs. Slattery begins reading him his rights. Good thing there's no crime lab to determine that the timeline for Roy's death more or less matches the time Bellick spent in the hospital, huh?
Night finally falls. Kellerman calls in to President Reynolds's office, and the operator says, "I'm sorry. This administration isn't familiar with an Agent Kellerman." Ah, but he's familiar with the administration. He says, "June, it's me. I need to speak with Caroline, now." There's a long pause, so Kellerman adds, "June, if you don't put me through, Iâll make sure that the president knows you're the one who wouldn't allow me to provide her with some very important information. Put me through to her, now." A rattled June repeats, "I'm sorry. This administration isn't familiar with an Agent Kellerman." Kellerman slams down the receiver and calls Kim. He gets sent straight to voicemail, and leaves this message: "Bill, don't do this. I've dedicated my life to this country, to Caroline. Everything I had, I did. I've been a perfect soldier. I've never asked anything of you, ever. But I'm asking... Bill, don't do this." Too late! Bill is already instructing his lab monkeys to erase Kellerman from every photo and "make him a ghost." Our magnificent bastard is about to have a mid-life -- or is that no-life? -- crisis.