Episode Report Card Pamie: C- | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Inappropriate!
By Pamie | Season 3 | Episode 6 | Aired on 11.04.2002
Oh...yay. Look, everybody...it's a town meeting. What a great place to...meet new townies and have...quirky happenings! Cardigan Man is upset that birds are landing on wires in town and pooping on people walking underneath. He thinks that some of the birds are doing it on purpose. Babette asks, "You get dumped on, Taylor?" Luke offers to pay "top dollar" to anyone who has a picture of Taylor getting "dumped on." Kirk offers to check the internet. Miss Patty explains to Cardigan Man that all animals have to relieve themselves. You know, some of us eat dinner while we watch this show. Cardigan Man wants to put sharp metal spikes on top of the fixtures, so that when the birds land, "Pow! They're shish-kebabs." Rory shouts, "That's cruel!" Babette says, "You can't do that!" And the townie we see so rarely (hey, you home game trivia buffs: he used to be a writer with Amy on Roseanne. His name's Mike Gandolfi, and his character's name is Andrew) says, "I'd rather have bird crap fall on my head." Lorelai: "There it is! Our town slogan!" Rory says she likes it.
A man bursts into Miss Patty's dance studio. He's looking for Miss Patty. He's holding a fistful of flowers and calls Miss Patty "Patricia." Lorelai starts the town teasing, and everyone "ooh"s appropriately. Miss Patty tells Jesus, our newest townie, that she's right in the middle of something, but that she'll be right out. "Patience," she says to him with a wave, and I can't believe Lorelai doesn't bust out with a whistle of the Guns n' Roses song. Oh, I guess they'd have to pay royalties to do that, right? Couldn't she whistle it badly and then Rory would ask what she's doing, and then she'd say she's trying to whistle "Patience"? What? What's that you say? I'm not writing this episode? I keep forgetting. It's like when my mom comes over and I've already cleaned the whole house but she always finds another place to clean, filling me with shame, but dammit if she doesn't get my tub much cleaner than I can ever get it. Jesus waits outside.
Cardigan Man tries to go back to the meeting, but Babette screeches like a crow, "Who's the fox, Patty?" Miss Patty says she met him at a funeral: "Great guy. Good dancer. Latin." Everyone coos again, and Cardigan Man has to call for order. Lorelai says that Jesus had better treat Miss Patty right. There's one extra in the back animatedly explaining to the man next to her who everybody is and why only Lorelai just gets to talk out of turn at these meetings. Babette asks Patty how well she knows this guy. Patty confesses that she just met him. Kirk says he'll look Jesus up on the internet. Cardigan Man bangs his gavel. He says they'll hold off on the bird spikes. "Let Miss Patty's date begin!" Lorelai declares. Everyone applauds and stands up. Babette hands Patty her digital camera and demands detailed photographs.