Episode Report Card Tippi Blevins: D+ | 2 USERS: F YOU GRADE IT Rube Goldberg's Deus Ex Machina
By Tippi Blevins | Season 9 | Episode 5 | Aired on 10.23.2009
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.Oliver blames himself for Lex's death because, well, he is to blame. Instead of fessing up, though, he continues to drown himself in booze and women. The woman this week is Victoria, aka Roulette, and the drinking establishment of choice is a high stakes casino of the same name. She cozies up to him after he loses a bunch of money and his sweet ride in one bad game of roulette after another. Feeling like he has nothing to lose, Oliver stupidly takes a pill she offers him. I spent most of the episode certain that most of the wacky goings-on would be revealed as some drug-addled vision quest, but that's not the case. What really happens is a super complicated plot that has Oliver being abducted, being accused of Victoria's shooting death, and losing all his money. Except Victoria turns out not to be dead after all. Turns out, she was behind the whole plot and it was a ruse to scam him out of his bank account.
Except… that's not really what happens, either. Turns out, it was all a very complicated plot to get Oliver to realize he's still a genuine hero. Victoria sets her club on fire, and instead of letting his tormentor die, Oliver rescues her. Except… she didn't really set her club on fire! The fire was under control the whole time! She didn't want his money. She just wanted him to know the truth.
Except… the truth is that Victoria isn't behind the plot at all. The mastermind is Chloe. Her reasoning is that she had to push Oliver really far so that she could pull him back. Or something. Oliver is thankful, and not at all mad that Lois inadvertently gets herself abducted by an ad-libbing Victoria when Lois tries to save Oliver from a situation he didn't actually need saving from. In the end, Oliver and Chloe are friends again, Oliver and Lois are friends again, and Oliver and his green leather outfit are friends again.
Oh, and somewhere offscreen, Clark has a chat with Jor-El because the surveillance video from last week's Ace of Clubs party shows Alia in attendance. She's the one who tried to kill Clark because he's going to destroy the world, remember? Except she's alive and she has a Kryptonian tattoo on her shoulder, which prompts Chloe and Clark to discover all the Kryptonian symbols burned all over the planet. I bet they spell out an advertisement for booze. What do you think?
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Previously on Smallville: Oliver killed Lex and framed the Toyman for it. Chloe and Clark were kind of ticked off about it for a while, but tried to give him pep talks anyway. Lois and Oliver had a little somethin' goin' on, but she decided she couldn't share him with the rest of the world. The Toyman tried to get Oliver to confess to the murder at a fancy party, but Oliver decided to just commit suicide instead; he didn't succeed. Oliver said goodbye to heroics by burning his Green Arrow outfit and looked very pretty by the glow of the fire.
A roulette wheel spins in slow motion to the strains of a song that makes me roll my eyes harder than the little ball that's going around in the wheel. A guy with a soft, emotional voice sings about how he's not just a mountain that's been moved and a river that has been all dried up, but is also a sky that nothing wants to fly in and a sun that doesn't burn hot. It's making me picture a fifteen-year-old boy sitting in his bedroom window, his long bangs artfully obscuring one teary eye, as he writes in his black leather journal about how no one understands his LONELINESS and SUFFERING. Instead of a moping teen, though, we find Oliver Queen at the roulette table, lost in his pain as the crowd around him laughs and parties in their fancy attire, oblivious to the waves of LONELINESS and SUFFERING that are emanating from him. He keeps betting and losing, to the point that even the dealer looks sorry. Oliver, all out of chips despite being a multibillionaire, throws his car keys on the table for one last bet. He loses again and drinks from a whiskey glass. A woman in a red satin dress starts walking toward him. She has a dragon tattoo on her left shoulder. Oliver heads for the bar and gets another drink. He drops his cocktail napkin and crouches down to pick it up real slow so that we can see the word "Roulette" on it. By the time he stands up again, the woman in red has reached him. She's Asian and wearing enough black eye shadow to make her look like a goth raccoon. "Now that looks like the face of a guy who's down on his luck," she says. Oliver, giving her a flirty look, says his luck is about to turn around. She says she's seen his type before: "The kind of player who can't find a game to satisfy him." Oliver admits to losing his lust for life, but not for "other things." She invites him to play a game with her. Oliver's interest and other parts are piqued. The woman takes three metal cups from the bar, upends them and instructs Oliver to pick one as she shuffles them. Oliver is disappointed in the lack of sexing in the game, but picks the middle cup. The cup is lifted, revealing a big, red, vitamin-looking pill. Oliver, seeing only the one pill, wonders if his new lady friend isn't joining him on the "trip." She says it's only for him, and promises it will be worth it. "Of course, you do have a choice," she says. "But what do you have to lose?" Oliver, who failed the D.A.R.E. program at school, whispers back, "Absolutely nothing." Oh, boohoo. Then turn yourself in to the cops, why don't you? Big moping whiner baby. He takes the mystery Geritol pill with a swig of whiskey.