Episode Report Card Lady Lola: F | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Mail Call-Out
By Lady Lola | Season 2 | Episode 5 | Aired on 08.26.2010
Eventually, everyone reconvenes at home. Sammi, still in the shower, tells JWoww and Snooki to read the note on her bed. They try not to laugh, but Sitch is loving. Every. Minute. Especially the "multiple fat women" reference. Needless to say, Sammi is not amused. JWoww claims innocence, saying she's "not getting involved" because she wasn't actually at da club when Ronnie's indiscretions occurred, but she does tell Sammi that she'll look like a fool if she stays with Ronnie after all this has come out. Best of all, Snooki claims she was blacked out and, thus, couldn't possibly have written it either. An excuse if I ever heard one! Instead of focusing on the fact that Ronnie is a prick of the highest caliber, Sammi obsesses over who wrote the note. Naturally, suspicions fall on Angelina. When Sammi walks back to the bathroom to get changed, Snooki and JWoww high-five over a job well done. JWoww concludes that if Sammi stays with Ronnie, then she'll look like "the dumbest bitch." With friends like these...
Ronnie eventually arrives back, wise to the fact that JWoww and Snooki had something to do with the letter. He declares that they are dead to him. He tries to talk to Sammi that night, but she has likewise decided that he's dead to her. He perpetrates all sorts of bullshit trying to make it look like she's the one that put the nail in the coffin on the relationship. At the end of the day, he's the one with the suffocating memory of fat chicks on his lap.
And in his phone book! Ronnie immediately sets about calling every cheap trick whose number he ever collected at some third-rate club engagement. He tells some hooker on the phone that she needs to provide the "S" to go with his "GT." She tries to be romantic and take it to the candlelit dinner place, but he tells her he wants the full-on Varsity Blues whip cream bikini treatment. Classy. And she goes for it!
Sammi interrupts, so he hangs up the phone. She tries to confront him about what a selfish bastard he is, but he turns it around about how she strung him along and yadda yadda yadda. She concludes that they were not meant to be. Congratulations, idiots! You finally came to a conclusion the rest of us reached five minutes into the third episode of Season One. Awesome.
Next week: More note drama. And more Vinny and Snooki snuggles!
Discuss this episode in our forums, then read the rules of a summer share!