Episode Report Card Erin: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Save the cheerleader. Save the -- wait, how does it go?
By Erin | Season 1 | Episode 5 | Aired on 10.22.2006
Elsewhere in the hotel, Nathan's riding the escalator with his bald, black lackey (hey, is that D.L.?) and telling him that he needs to talk to someone by the name of "Sakamoto." Just as he's getting off the up escalator, Niki's getting on the down. Nathan stops her and remarks that he didn't think he'd see her again. He joins her on the ride down and asks her what the hell she did to him. "I could ask you the same thing," she says, clearly pissed off. All she knows is she woke up in his room and he was gone. Nathan's all, uh, the whuh? You mean you don't remember the kick-ass animal sex we had all night and how awesome I was in the sack? "We have a great dinner and then you leave, then you come back and attack me -- I had one of the best nights of my entire life -- and the next thing I know, someone's trying to throw me into a van?" That sounds like a damn fine evening to me, Nathan.
Niki swears she had no idea what happened last night. All she knows is that when she met him, she was trying to be someone she's not and that's not who she wants to be. Nathan sincerely asks her who she wants to be, and she responds that she wants to be someone good. "A good mother," she says. "Not the person I see in the mirror." "Look," says Nathan, removing his glasses, "I don't know how much of last night was an act and how much was you, but... the girl I met... that's the kind of girl you spend your entire life waiting to meet. Somebody strong, somebody beautiful, somebody... good." Aw. Niki ruins the beautiful moment by saying that she didn't know "they" were going to do anything to him. By "they" she means Linderman and his people. She goes on to say that "they" blackmailed her, just like they're going to blackmail him. Nathan realizes what's happened and kind of steps back from her, asking if "they" taped the butt-nekkid sex-o-rama. She sort of nods her head and apologizes profusely and he just walks away.
Zzzzzzzz -- what? Oh. Sorry. We're back with Matt and Mrs. Matt, so I thought it was nap time. I mean it. I hate this story. LOVE Grunberg, LOVE the show, want to KILL this story. Matt's wearing a tie and pouring wine and the table is set and the food is prepared and everything is lovely. Mrs. Matt enters and offers up a heartfelt "Wow." She asks what "all this" is and instead of just saying he wanted to treat her to a nice dinner, he starts rattling off all of these things that he clearly has heard in her mind; like, the Shiraz she mentioned that she liked when they went to Napa a million years ago, how she's been thinking about going back, porterhouse steaks that she's been craving, and that song she's had in her head for days? Well, he just happened to go and buy the disc for her! Like, it's kind of adorable how earnest he is, but, um, he could really be handling this all with a bit more finesse. He doesn't have to present her with the entire menu from the "Things I've Been Thinking About But Never Say" Restaurant. I'd be really creeped out by my husband if he started doing this. I'd definitely start locking my diary in a safe buried out in the yard.