Episode Report Card Kim: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Not Quite All Stars
By Kim | Season 15 | Episode 1
Judges? Carrie Ann is taken aback, and thinks Bristol is the most improved, especially her confidence, but she needs to be sharper. Len also liked her confidence and her legs, but she needs more fluidity in her arms. Bruno tells Bristol that she's "refreshed, revived, refurbished." Was that a reference to her plastic surgery? Bruno thinks she needs power and focus. Scores: Carrie Ann 6.5, Len 6.5, and Bruno 6.5. Well, if the baseline is 7, she was just below average, so that's fair.
Drew Lachey won the second season with Cheryl, but now he's partnered with Anna, who tells him that the show is much harder and more intense. She's not wrong, but Drew thinks he can hang with the best. We'll see. This really is a different show from the early seasons. And Drew's "Save a Horse" freestyle is overrated. Yeah, I said it. Hmm. This is weird. Drew looks really, really nervous. One of his strengths was always that he's a great performer, even if his technique is not quite there. He is also a miniature person, by the way. Anyway, he seems really nervous and stiff, and he gets ahead of the beat. Anna tries to get him to loosen up by making big faces at him, but he's just timid. And I don't get why, because he's really talented and the few big moves he makes look good. Odd.
Judges? Len says he liked it but Drew was too stiff, even though he was precise. Bruno thought it was dynamic and they had good chemistry, although Drew did stiffen up a bit in parts. Carrie Ann thought his posture was fabulous, but he needs to work on being "firm but not rigid." Tom, being a pro, lets that one lie. I don't usually comment on Brooke's post-dance interviews because they are stupid, but I have to say Drew answered her dumb questions like a pro, was smart about it and entertaining, but didn't stumble. I seriously don't know why they don't let him co-host, except that he doesn't have boobs. Scores: Carrie Ann 7, Len 7, and Bruno 7.5. Average. Maybe a slight overscore.
Kelly Monaco won the first season. She wasn't that good. I will say this - she only had six weeks. Maybe she would have been better with more time. And I won't even get into the controversy where she might not have actually been the winner, since the show's obviously not going to go there. All I remember from the first season is Joey McIntyre's buns. Sorry. Anyway, Kelly is partnered with Val and all they can talk about is their sexual tension, which means they don't have any.
They have the cha cha. Kelly definitely has a strong stage presence and an amazing body. Her dancing is good but not great and I'm having trouble pinpointing why. Her shoulders are a little high and she gets off balance at times. She's just mediocre to me. Maybe the judges will have more specific critiques. Bruno thinks Kelly is sexier and hotter than ever, and he's amazed that she's never done this dance before. Carrie Ann can't believe how hot their chemistry is, but Kelly needs to lengthen her legs. Len doesn't think Kelly was this good in her season, and advises her to lower her shoulders. Well, the judges loved it. Scores: Carrie Ann 7, Len 7, and Bruno 7.5. Man, for all their gushing, I thought the scores would be higher.