Episode Report Card Joe R: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Higher Education
By Joe R | Season 1 | Episode 7 | Aired on 09.18.2005
Back at the hospital, Celia's fallen asleep and Isabelle is rooting through her purse looking for money for that vending machine trip her mom was talking about. Behind her, in comes Celia's mother -- Isabelle calls her "Gran Pat" which is good enough for me -- played by Concetta Tomei, and if Isabelle had begun thinking she could relax now that Mom's gone mellow, she's back in her defensive posture now, because everything that makes Celia awful she got from her mom. Isabelle flees to find a vending machine while Pat harangues Celia for wanting to eat vending machine food or the cheeseburger Dean's gone to get her. Celia lets out an exasperated "Mother..." before thinking better of it and saying, "It was thoughtful of you to come." Pat doesn't seem to know what to do with Sweet Celia any more than we do.
At the Botwins', Sanjay (yeah, Sanjay!) is tutoring Silas on his math. Silas says his brain is too fried to do any more studying. Megan tries to sign him something, but Silas can't decipher it so she has to ask out loud what underwear she was wearing last Thursday. Silas immediately knows it was the Powerpuff Girls ones, so I guess that means his brain isn't as fried as he says. Sanjay starts signing something to Megan, so now Silas feels doubly stupid, and when Nancy gets home she manages to work out a very rudimentary signed greeting to Megan (who appreciates the effort with a high five), so now Silas is the only one he knows who can't sign to his deaf girlfriend. After he and Megan leave, Sanjay mentions to Nancy that if she knows of anyone else who needs the tutoring, please let him know -- he's paying his way through college and could really use the money. Nancy asks how come a smart kid like Sanjay is going to state school. "I'm a highly intelligent underachiever, with debt," he explains. "It's all about the Benjamins, Mrs. Botwin." Nancy's got that look in her eye again.
Cut to the Valley State campus, where Nancy's leading a queasy-looking Sanjay up to the local burnout depository, at the top of an overgrown, yet incredibly visible, hill. Some stoner leers at Nancy and asks whose mom she is, and she answers that question with dime bags. Soon enough, Stoner's taking a pull off his bong, and Nancy tells the assembled kids that if they want more from where that came from, find Sanjay: "He's got the hookup." Sanjay stands there awkwardly, looking like he's got your DSL hookup, but not much else. Nancy walks away, reminding them to brush their teeth and do their homework, and Stoner admires her "nice mom ass" as she leaves. Hey! That's a nice ass for just about anyone, mister.