Episode Report Card Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Great Expectations (1)
By Kim | Season 2 | Episode 10 | Aired on 01.15.2000
Some guy is studying a driver's license, and then looking at Ben. The picture on the license looks more like Tony Shalhoub than Ben. He must know this, because Ben starts "Buying Beer with Fake ID Ploy #256," which is "Make small talk with your friends, as if you are not the least bit nervous." I would also like to point out that by all rights the guy should proof Felicity also, since she looks all of twelve years old. Not that I've ever hid outside the store while my friend with the fake ID bought alcohol, mind you. But I've heard stories. Anyway, the guy decides Ben passes muster and sells him some beer. Ben and Felicity go down some stairs to a door that's broken. Felicity worries that they're going to "get in trouble and get fired." Ben says that Javier won't even know they left early. Felicity starts giggling and Ben asks her what's up. Felicity points out that Ben always calls him "ha-vee-AY" when it's actually pronounced "ha-vee-AIR." Yeah, that's hilarious. Ben asks if she wants to go back, and Felicity says no, and Ben opens the door. They enter a big room and Ben goes to turn on some lights. Turns out it's the pool. Felicity mentions that she can't believe the ID worked. I can't believe that they needed two six-packs of beer for two people. I mean, Felicity never drinks, and how many does Ben need, really? Ben says his ID always works, and he opens a beer for Felicity and one for himself, and they toast to "ha-vee-AY." If Ben's humor arsenal consists of stale millennium jokes and mispronouncing the name of his boss, he better not quit his day job for the comedy circuit any time soon.
Sean is watching television when Julie arrives home. He asks her where she was, and she tells him she was out with Cheesy Eric. Sean asks where, and Julie tells him to get bent. Actually, she tells him they went out to dinner, but I don't see why it's any of his business. Sean decides it's time to make his big move, and asks Julie if they can talk. She walks over, but before he can profess his love, he notices her contract. She hands it over and Sean says, "Three songs -- that's amazing! And, no nookie?" Julie gets all insulted and says no. Sean apologizes and says he was wrong about Cheesy Eric. Julie says that Eric actually thinks she's talented. Sean says he knows she's talented. This gets Julie's attention, and she asks what he wanted to talk about. Sean tells her to forget it.
Ben is down to his underwear, or they might have been swimming trunks. It's hard to say. Felicity is behind him, taking off her pants and telling him not to look. Ben says that they shared a bed, but Felicity says it was a long time ago. Ben counters with, "Not that long ago." Felicity dives into the pool wearing her t-shirt and underwear. The dialogue during this part is really inane. All you need to know is that they are flirting like mad. There are many shots of them underwater. Ben does a cannonball into a lap pool, which doesn't seem wise. Felicity does a special trick, which turns out to be a handstand. Ben asks about Felicity's dad, and she says she doesn't want to talk about it. At one point, Ben swims by and his underwear is sliding down and I swear, I saw his butt. Not that I was looking. I just keep thinking what a bad idea it is to swim alone, while drinking, and I'm sure that they are going to crack their skulls on the bottom of the pool. That is how I know I am an old lady. Later, they sit on the diving board with five empty bottles, and of course a security guard comes in.