Episode Report Card Jeff Long: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Will Work For Fabric
By Jeff Long | Season 10 | Episode 8 | Aired on 09.06.2012
At Parsons, Heidi greets the designers on the runway. She tells them that for the next challenge, they will need, in addition to their design skills, some negotiation skills. Elena kind of grunts and I can't tell if it's a grunt of "Holy shit, no one likes me, this is dangerous" or a "Do I get to use my brass knuckles for this?" grunt. Heidi asks the group which of them is a good negotiator and everyone raises their hand. Hmm, we'll see. Alicia interviews that she has been in the bottom two twice and just really needs to make something dope. Tim is waiting for them in the workroom to tell them about the challenge. "Negotiation?" ponders Sonjia as Heidi gallops away.
In the workroom, the designers arrive to find tons of arts and crafts shit. My worst nightmare. I don't know when to stop. My own forays into arts and crafts offend every sing sensibility I have in regards to aesthetics. There's just something in my brain that's like, "Hey, I'm here, you're here pipe cleaners and little pom-pom balls, wanna get naked and just seriously fuck up this shoe box or hand mirror that your poor mother is going to get for Mothers Day?" Like, arts and crafts brings out a weird sex addiction-type behavior in me. It's all quantity. I'm dead-eyed Michael Fassbender just fucking the fuck out of every color of glitter puffy glue that you can provide for me. I'm terrified just thinking about it.
Melissa says that when they walked into the room and saw all of the arts and crafts stuff, she was immediately excited. That's really shocking to me. She doesn't seem like the type. Gunnar, who has been so successful (at least as a presence on our televisions that we don't hate, if not as a designer) approaching these later challenges with something a friend of mine referred to as an "anti-cynicism," is grinning and upbeat and hugs an already miserable Elena. Bitch needs to pull herself together. Elena interviews that she doesn't like sparkles or glitter or any of that shit. She really seems to thrive on negative energy. It's uncomfortable for me to watch.
Tim greets them and tells them that this is an exciting day. They're not going to have a budget for this challenge. They're going to be doing their own fundraising. Hmm. They are going to be creating merchandise for people to buy on the streets. There are t-shirts all around. He says that they are going to be creating fun things that will be irresistible to people so that they can go shopping for fabrics and notions at Mood. Elena complains that, not only do they have to make ugly-ass shit, they have to try to sell it to New Yorkers on the streets. "Are you kidding me?" Yes, Elena. This is all a joke. The show, after 10 seasons, has decided that this will be the austere season, except for the practical joke that the show features twists and turns and challenges just like every other one of its seasons. The real show starts after this one is finished. I'm being silly, but her constant shock that the show is requiring things of them that it has required from everyone since the series' inception is highly annoying. Tim says that they're not limited to selling merchandise. They can sell fashion advice or alterations, if they'd like. He asks them what they think and Dmitry says, "Crazy." He assures them that it's going to be fun.