Episode Report Card Keckler: B | 76 USERS: C+ YOU GRADE IT Home on the Rage
By Keckler | Season 4 | Episode 3 | Aired on 2004.10.22
Do you want to know what TiVo's description of tonight's show is? "Trip goes with T'Pol to the planet Vulcan to meet her mother, T'Les, but when T'Pol reconsiders marriage to her former fiancé, he questions their relationship." Take out "the planet Vulcan" and I swear I've seen that episode of Friends, ER, Dawson's Creek, Jack and Jill, Gilmore Girls, Miss Match, Everwood, and Felicity.
Anyway.
A sh'pod zooms above a CGI'd San Franciscape and lands in a weird, flat roofless edifice jutting out into the water. It sort of looks like a British football field crossed with a destroyer, and an air hockey video game. What I don't understand is, why would you take the trouble of having such a massive structure jut out into the ocean and yet have no windows from which to see the water? It's a puzzler.
Quantum and Qrew stride up a red carpet and Admiral Forrest says, "Well done, Jonathan," but we all know that he's really thinking, "Curses -- foiled again!" Quantum delivers a speech with a stiffitude to end all stiffly stiffness, but tries to counteract his very stiffosity by bobbing his head around like a blind porpoise with ADD. It's very distracting. While the captain is stiffing out that his crew, and not him, are the real heroes of the mission, T'Pol stares out at the cheering crowd and tries hard not to CRACK WHORE her shit all over the place. In a moment of "thoughtful" "solemnity," Quantum mentions their lost crewmen and we're all supposed to feel sad. However, I can't help but wonder where this "thoughtful" "solemnity" was when Trip lost what we are later led to believe was the only family member he had left in the world. At any rate, during this mention of the twenty-seven honored dead, Reed looks over and nods at May-Bar-Fly like, "Yeah, that's true," and May-Bar-Fly's look says, "Yeah, he's right -- people did die." I'm sure it was intended to be a "moment" but it was unintentionally quite humorous. Or maybe I'm just sick and twisted.
Did you know that if you play the theme song backwards, it says "Keckler will die"?
In a bar, that may or may not be the 602 Club, Quantum stalks right up to the bar and orders a Scotch. Ah, you see, it's a testament to how much Quantum has Gone Through that he now drinks Scotch instead of beer.