Episode Report Card Sara M: D+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Honor Thy Agent
By Sara M | Season 9 | Episode 18 | Aired on 04.24.2005
Nurse Ratched says that she and Melissa would hate living together. Melissa says that doesn't matter because she has to take care of her mother. "Well, that is so pathetic," says Nurse Ratched, as Louise Fletcher suddenly realizes that some things just aren't worth the money. Nurse Ratched says she taught Melissa to take care of herself, just like her mother taught her to take care of herself, which is what she intends to do. As for Melissa, she should get a better job and travel around the world, and, of course, "start a family." "With who?" asks Melissa. "'Whom,'" corrects Nurse Ratched. That right there would be enough for me to be okay with walking out of this woman's life. Nurse Ratched adds that if Melissa doesn't find the right man, she can always do what she and Melissa's dad did: adopt. "You never mentioned…" RevCam starts, and it would have been hilarious if Melissa didn't know she was adopted until just now. But, no. Melissa gets in a good line when she snaps a "What does it matter?" in response. We learn that the reason why Melissa is so obsessed with taking care of her mother is because she is so grateful to her for adopting her. Whatever. Nurse Ratched says repayment isn't necessary, and Melissa's constant worry stressed her out so much that she got an ulcer. Way to blame, Mom. I'm just pissed that a golden opportunity for RevCam to tell us about Ruthie's adoption has yet again been missed.
Nurse Ratched says that when she does die, she wants Melissa to remember her fondly, not be relieved that her burden is finally over, like Annie was when her father died. RevCam offers up this pearl of wisdom: "It seems like there are two types of children: those who don't take care of their parents when they get old, and those who do." And some are sons, while the rest are daughters. Shut up, RevCam. Melissa and Mom ignore the silly man they invited into their lives as he blathers on about how Melissa should always do what her mother tells her to, and the church they don't belong to will always be there for them.
Annie kicks Lucy out of the car. She gets in and tries not to laugh as she tells Ruthie that she heard about Vincent. Ruthie says Vincent's parents thought he shouldn't see just one person, and he agreed because he didn't think their relationship was "going anywhere," i.e. Vincent found a girl who would have sex with him. Annie hugs Ruthie, and Ruthie asks her how she can be so nice when Ruthie was "so bad." Oh, good Christ, Ruthie, it's not like you murdered Vincent or, worse, TP'ed a gym. Annie tells Ruthie that she can't date for a month. Ruthie thinks that's just fine. Annie adds that Ruthie has to ask for her permission before she does anything, and she can only talk on the phone for fifteen minutes. So, Annie says, when Vincent calls, begging to Ruthie to take him back, she can only talk to him for fifteen minutes. And Annie assures Ruthie that Vincent will come back, because all teenage boys do. Yeah, don't build up false expectations in poor Ruthie's head or anything there, Annster. Ruthie says that the whole time she was with Vincent today, she couldn't enjoy herself because she felt so guilty about lying to Annie. Ruthie says the "pain" of being rejected and defying her mother was more than she could take. Would someone please give this family some real problems? Annie hugs Ruthie. "I'm here for you, Ruthie," she says, "to share your joy and your pain." And she'll never leave. "We'll get through this," she says, her arm wrapped around Ruthie's neck.