Episode Report Card M. Giant: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Diplomessy
By M. Giant | Season 4 | Episode 21 | Aired on 05.08.2005
Buchanan reenters the conference room. Consulate Cop is just getting around to Kiefer's hourlies, which show him working on data processing with DoDder between 1:00 AM and 3:00 AM. DoDder confirms it. Consulate Cop asks which analyst they gave the data to. She names Lispy Skip without hesitation. Interesting how the fake hourlies they came up with also cover up Kiefer's raid on the bar, but not the hour he spent trying to figure out how to get away with torturing Prado and then actually torturing him. That should make things interesting next time we want to complain to China about its human rights violations. Consulate Cop is skeptical that CTU would waste someone with Kiefer's qualifications on data processing. DoDder babbles smoothly for a minute about Kiefer's experience coming in useful in the course of work he didn't do. Consulate Cop says he's surprised that DoDder was working on the floor, since the clinic logs show her husband was busy dying during the hours she was supposed to be working with Kiefer. If the logs mention that Grayadder died because the doctor was busy treating the guy who was kidnapped from the Consulate instead, the Consulate Cop doesn't appear to notice. He comes right out and accuses her of lying to cover for Kiefer. Buchanan jumps in -- much too late, considering he's the one who screwed up this cover-up so badly, picking the worst possible person in the entire building for Kiefer to have been "working with," short of Grayadder or Lee himself. Consulate Cop says he's not going to "endure half-baked alibis." DoDder says Consulate Cop can believe what he wants, but she has to get back to work. She stomps out of the conference room, pissed off that now the People's Republic of China has an official record that she sucks. Which she does, but not in the way they think.
Exactly two minutes after we last saw Kiefer in his suit, he and Curtis are already on the road and back in their hideout-raiding clothes, with Kiefer at the wheel of the CTUMobile. Palmer calls to get an update on their operation, and reminds Kiefer, "This warhead can detonate at any moment now." Palmer changes the subject to the Consulate Cop, and Kiefer says that CC was still at CTU when they left. "Are we okay there?" Palmer asks pointedly. Kiefer tells Palmer about the photo of Agent Burn, and the story he came up with that "should hold them off for a while." Palmer thanks Kiefer, wishes him good luck, and ends the call. It's 3:47:16. Palmer tells PMHC that he needs to tell the Veep that the Consulate Cop has to leave CTU now. Which is odd, because the Veep specifically gave Palmer power to deal directly with CTU, as opposed to, say, ordering invasions of Chinese territory. PMHC reminds Palmer that the Veep wanted the Consulate Cop to have access. "And he has," says Palmer, but now he has to go. "CTU has to be able to do their job without the added pressure of a cover-up." Have Buchanan tell Consulate Cop that. I'm sure he'll understand. PMHC says he'll see what he can do, and heads into the Undal Office to talk to the Veep.
After the Veep finishes blowing somebody off over the phone, PMHC tells him about Consulate Cop's continued presence at CTU. The Veep's still pissed about the reason that Consulate Cop is there at all, and further complains that kicking the Consulate Cop out of CTU will telegraph guilt and give the Chinese "all the justification they need to escalate this crisis." PMHC, still trying to get himself into the promo, says that unless they find the warhead, "Ten million Americans could face annihilation." "And we could be at war with a billion Chinese," the Veep promos right back. PHMC advises the Veep to "worry about the Americans now and the Chinese later." "Your advice or David Palmer's advice?" the Veep paranoids. "When I agreed to let you bring Palmer in, it wasn't so the two of you could form an alliance against me." The thing about being Vice President is that you have lots of time to watch reality TV. "You and Palmer are running this country while I'm taking phone calls from mid-level staffers." Hey, dude, you asked for this coup. PMHC reads my mind: "Would you like me to ask President Palmer to leave?" PMHC says. That shuts the Veep up. "No," he finally says. "Call CTU. Tell Bill Buchanan to escort Consulate Cop out of the building." But his attitude says there's going to be a reckoning for this later. I reckon. It's 3:49:13.