Episode Report Card M. Giant: C+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Mole Patch
By M. Giant | Season 3 | Episode 20 | Aired on 04.26.2004
At 8:14:45, the CTU agents in the AV trailer hope that the ambient blue light flatters them, a cadre of Secret Service agents steps off an elevator looking purposeful, and Saunders looks the opposite of purposeful. The Secret Service agents, led by that lipless gnome Aaron, make their way to Palmer's office, where they surround the Brothers Palmer in a way that even Palmer seems to find somewhat intimidating. When he asks what's up, Aaron reports that since Los Angeles is no longer safe, it's time for Palmer to leave the state. Yay! No more pointless Palmer scenes! Palmer would just as soon stay, but Aaron's not budging. Go Aaron! He's invoking Section 32 of something, which allows him to order the President to Air Force One. Palmer turns to Brother Palmer for backup, but all he gets is, "I'm not familiar with the specifics of the code but it seems Secret Service is invoking it." I can't believe this clown has the same job as Leo McGarry. Palmer pulls Aaron aside into an adjoining office for a private word. Blah blah, he wants to stand shoulder to shoulder with his people, face the threat with them, yadda yadda yadda. And I think this is as good a time as any to mention that I couldn't be more over Palmer if he were in a mine. For one thing, he's not that bright; for another, he only ever speaks in high-minded proclamations that are of no practical use; and for a third, every time he tries to solve a problem he just makes it worse. All of which, admittedly, makes him entirely believable as a President of the United States, but it gets kind of frustrating to watch. Anyway, Palmer prevails upon Aaron to agree to protect him in L.A. Aaron goes for "touched," but he's such a sourpuss that his expression comes out more like "you poor, dumb, doomed bastard." He returns to the outer office at 8:17:31, and all of the other Secret Service agents, who weren't present for Aaron's conversation with the president, follow him out into the hall without his having to say a word to anyone. I thought those wires they wear only went into their ears, but apparently they go all the way to the brain and render them telepathic. Eerie. After they're gone, Palmer's desk phone beeps with the announcement that the conference call is about to begin.
What conference call? This one: from CTU, Soul Patch has hooked up a call between himself, the Brothers Palmer, and Kiefer in the AV trailer in Santa Barbara. Soul Patch explains that it's going to take up to fifteen minutes to pinpoint Saunders's location, and Palmer resolves that he's not going to meet Saunders's latest demand. Kiefer makes sure the president understands that this means their only option will be to use Spawnders as a hostage. Palmer gives his blessing and drops off of the call. Soul Patch tells Kiefer that they're going to need to keep Saunders on the line for about a minute in order to trace his location. Kiefer hangs up and steps into the back room to put his hostage to work. Spawnders is reticent about calling her dad, but Kiefer reminds her that they're out of time.