Episode Report Card Michael Neal: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Greenzo
By Michael Neal | Season 2 | Episode 5 | Aired on 11.07.2007
Cut to: Next Morning -- Jack's Office. His hair is frazzled as if, not unlike Greenzo's resolve, it had been in the wind or a hurricane for too long. He's speaking to the entire staff about last night's party and, in between, we see glimpses of the night before: Frank and Lutz strangling each other, Lemon trying to make out with Grizz, Tracy clawing at his face in the bathroom mirror, Cerie punching out Jack, Lemon throwing up on someone in a wolf costume. Back to Jack's office, now it's Kenneth's turn to speak: "Y'all should be ashamed of yourself," he scolds. Apparently Lutz ate his parrot's medication, Tracy stole his sink, and Lemon, entwined in an intense love triangle with Grizz and Dot Com, made them both cry. She turns to apologize. Kenneth lays down the law to an amassed and humbled staff.
But what about the jokes? Well, on a show dripping with manic comic talent, I was surprised to have noticed so many good Schwimmer moments. A few:
You're watching Haaad Ball
"Hillary Clinton wants an all-homosexual army. How will that affect my family?"
Aggressive-aggressive mother issues and their relation to the very, very conscious
Greenzo: "I just wish my mom were still alive...so I could rub it in her fat face."
A Friends reunion?
Greenzo: "Well kids, you can tell your parents to buy a GE front loading washing machine to save water, because if the earth's not here, where else is Greenzo going to dance?" (Cue the music)
Only to be said while wearing a cape or a duster
Greenzo: "Greenzo out!"
Native-American Beached Whale Hollywood Black List Vindication Cocaine Panty Flash Amuse Brioche
Greenzo: "Are you saying actors can't change the world? I guess nobody bothered to tell Sharon Stone."
And that was just the guest star. As for the regulars:
An honest to God Better Than Ezra party?
Kenneth: "Hope you're ready to party like its 1999, which according to my bible will be in 7 years."
Art Vandelay's lawyer
Tracy: "People are like Lemmings...Harvey Lemmings, my lawyer. He never misses a party."
Lemon: "That's not a real person. You made that up."
There are lies in the pamphlets on churned butter tourism
Lemon: "People are going to show up expecting all this great stuff and they're going to be disappointed and angry."
Tracy: "Just like Colonial Williamsburg."
American Idol minus the clunky America part